A History of Perfidy // Alliliana and James

Today had been a good day so far. It was bright and beautiful. The sun shone down and bathed him in its lavishing warmth. James was in a good mood. In all honesty, it was a rare occasion. He managed most days. James wasn't one to mope about all the time. He did what he needed to do and moved on to the next task at hand. Only at the end of the day will he lay his body down to rest.

Though his body rested, it's more often than not his mind refuses to rest with it. All his thoughts invade the serenity of his usually calm mind as soon as the sun retreats back below the horizon. It's just how he worked. It's how he functioned. So while his body laid still, masquerading itself as relaxed but truly the polar opposite, his mind wandered into the depths of humanity.

Not literally, of course. But that's what his mind was generally on. The human species. It's just perfect, huh? It amazed James how cruel humans could be to one another. It was sickening. He took a moment to remember back to his childhood. Sometimes James wished he could just be a kid again. He wondered if people still remember what that's like, being a kid. If they remember when getting high meant swinging on the playground? When protection meant wearing a helmet? When the worst things people could contract from one another were cooties? Fathers' shoulders were the highest place on earth and mothers were their heroes? Everyone's worst enemies were their siblings. Race issues were about who ran the fastest. War was only a card game. And the only drug everyone knew was cough medicine. When wearing a skirt didn’t make anyone a slut. The most pain people felt was when they skinned their knees, and goodbyes only meant until tomorrow? And all of them wanted to be grown up so bad they couldn't stand it. Do they still want that?

So much is lost to this world. So much. James wishes dearly he could give all of the kids in every District a childhood. Because he knows they haven't gotten one. He wishes children weren't forced to grow up straight after exiting the womb. He wished there was a way to fix this world without it costing the lives of the few who were still clinging to a nearly nonexistent piece of hope. And lastly, he wished that, once all the others were free, he too could be set free from the ever so present chains trapping him to this cold and miserable planet.

Where is Grace in this so called mighty land? Can it be found where the children dig into their parched faiths for some minute shred of hope? Can it be found in the mercy a cloud brings on a scorching sunny day? Can it be found in the hearts of those who have been forgotten and those who have done the forgetting? Perhaps it just can't be found.

But no one will believe that. So the faithless will continue searching for makeshift idols. The lost will continue searching for a road they will never find. And the fearful will continue walking through the darkness alone until someone is brave enough to take their hand. And the hateful will continue searching for a mercy they will never receive. Is this where their fate lies? Those who keep their minds on what they have lost will never be able see what they still have that's worth fighting for.

His thoughts were hostile against those who give up. Perhaps even dangerously so. Though as he walked through the darkened streets of District Five, he couldn't get the somewhat pessimistic thoughts to exit his overworked brain.

The street lights were on and shone on the path he was taking. At least it wasn't completely dark. Slight shifts in pebbles and the whispering of the light breeze brought James' attention out of his mind and back to the world. He listened closely for any sounds.