Ring of Fire // Day 3
Jun 18, 2012 17:47:52 GMT -5
Post by Baby Wessex d9b [earthling] on Jun 18, 2012 17:47:52 GMT -5
This is my December, this is me alone, and I just wish that I didn't feel
Like there was something I missed
It was like the onset of the storm; sudden and violent and totally foreign. Nonnie clearly had one foot in the next life. The last day of training Mace had been unusually out of sorts. Instead of focusing on technique, we sat in front of the television for the afternoon. He flipped to the deaths in the fifty-ninth, and we worked our way backwards from there. I didn't have to ask him why we skipped the sixtieth; even I hear rumors, on occasion, and I wasn't sure I wanted to see Julian right then either. So we started with Mace's Games and went backwards, stopping only for the deaths, for those last few moments. Some were longer than others - some lasted hours. Those were the worst.
But of all the things Mace taught me, it's one of the few skills I think I've really mastered. I can see it now, the ebbing heart beat, the delirium in their eyes. It's a feeling, too, a heavy acceptance in my gut that tells me when a tribute is too far gone, too close to death's cold embrace to come back. It wasn't especially fast or slow with Nonnie; but the moment of stepping over, of transitioning, is not at all as grim as I expected.
My dagger still bleeds her blood as I pull up short, shocked that Pandora has decided to cover Nonnie at expense to himself, or embrace her. And then I see what's really happened - he's killed her, pushed over that edge into a place that we'll all soon follow.
Breaths come too quickly and dizziness sets in. There wasn't enough time to do or say anything. And what would I have said? This is my sister, my brothers, and they will never have more than a few sunrises, and you will live on and on in your beautiful children? Was I different? But her screams are silenced now, and I know she was wrong. I only have one thing to say. "Give my brother's love to Larae, and peace be with you."
My words are quiet as I slink back towards Mahlah. We seem to come at each other at the same time, a tandem rhythm that's developed in the last day. I touch her back, a strand of her dark hair with my knuckles, still white from gripping the bloody blade. But this isn't over, this storm, this day, this death - it just goes on and on. Guilt weighs my stomach down, not over what I've done with my dagger, but over the relief I feel that someone else ended things, and ended things well. I think Mace would have been proud of that, especially if I'd found the courage to follow through. But I didn't, not for Nonnie.
Mahlah screams and I realize that the guilt and the shock has frozen me, taken me away from the moment. I hadn't even noticed Mr. Woodards moving forward, but she did, and I could never repay the debt that was between us already. My sluggish heart swells, and though I still can't think exactly straight, I've always been a pretty good follower.
I shift when Mahlah moves, and I follow her attack exactly.
[[ Elon attacks Pandora; dagger ]]
[dice=200+2000]
[[ Shallow Cut on Left Shoulder -- 3.5 damage ]]
banner credit: it's a love story
lyrics: linkin park my december
[rand=390281260246410979366146135143936776007695589214609819275932386518]lyrics: linkin park my december