{Bras and Cocaine} | Brik

It was cold and wet, but then again every day had been cold in the district, the days never seemed to change. They were just all the same. Cold in the morning cold at night. It was always the same no change. To Xana it was what one would call dull, or better boring. The house was warm though, but the bright light of the cigarette in Xana’s mouth made no difference. She breathed in heavily feeling the terrific drug race through her. It was her morning routine. A time when she could relax and be herself before her parents woke up and dragged her into their little doctor’s clinic. After all to them any school dropout had to work and what a better way to learn was there than practical. A bitter smile plays at the edges of her lips.

She hated them so much; she wished she could just walk away and do what she wanted. Be what she wanted. But no the gutless girl stayed, she continued the morning routine that she hoped would one day end her misery. Maybe than she would see her cat. Little Sage, but of course she wouldn’t the good go the heaven the bad go to hell, that was exactly where she would be going. Taking in another deep breath, Xana let out a long sigh, the clouded mixture of her breath and the foul cigarette contents floated into the air, mingling with the rest of the fog that clouded the room. The morning light tried to seep through the dark pullover of the curtains, curtains that had been sawn permanently downwards.

No light could enter the room that way its contents would remain unknown, but still the light was persistent and small rays flickered over the edges of her room, lighting up mounds upon mounds of rubbish and dirty clothes. It was disgusting. Just the way Xana loved it. The cigarette finds itself to her lips again, inhaling and exhaling one last time she dumps the butt onto the ground. There it falls onto the pile that is littered with hundreds of more. It just adds to the disgusting look of her room. Xana yawns showing of her yellow stained teeth. She stands up stretching her cramped muscles from the awkward position.

With a roll of her eyes she reluctantly turns and leaves her room, the corridor was dark and smelled awful. It was from the lack of cleaning and care. Xana lived in a small “house” more like shack in her parents backyard. It was a horrible little place that she never took care of. Of course Xana loved it. She crosses onto the cool lawn barefoot, the due soaking into her feet making them cold and numb within seconds. She blinks repeatedly squinting against the bright morning light of the sun. As she passes under the veranda her eyes land on a pair of shoes. A scowl creases her forehead as her anger builds up in her. Her brother was her, her perfect little know it all brother.

Xana glares coldly at the shoes. Angrily she shoves open the door to the back house/clinic. Inside the house was toasty warm, everything was clean and shone with a look of age, but age hadn’t yet worn down the house as much as it had Xana. She was only eighteen and yet her eyes were sunken in and red rimmed, her skin that had once been so tanned and healthy now had a sickly yellow shade to it. Sometimes she believed she needed more help than the patients that she treated. Her hair hung drily around her face. Part of it was up in a bun whilst most of it lay strung around a tired looking face.

Stifling a yawn Xana walks past the kitchen, ignoring the food that begged for her attention. She hadn’t eaten in days, and although her body craved the food she felt no inclination to eat it. Still dressed in her pyjamas Xana walks into the clinic. It smelt as always like what a surgery does. That clean smell that makes you shiver with disgust. Ugh. Xana wrinkles her nose in disgust. She didn't want to be here today, she had a party she needed to be at. Fustrated she lashes out at the wall of the reception. Her fist connects with it and she hers it snap. “FUCK MY LIFE” She calls in pain. The pain explodes through her arm and she hobbles backwards.

As soon as she sees the next doctor she forgets about her patients and shoves the boy away he falls to the ground landing on what she saw as a broken wrist. Opps. “I broke my fucking hand fix it.”