Stay the Silence [Geebs]

Sicily O'Shea

I spend my time at the bottom of the barrel
Its never easy if you never shoot straight.

Though she tried desperately to hide the smile that rose to her lips as she caught the Peacekeeper's eyes traveling down her body, she couldn't help but let the corners of her mouth twitch upward just so. A thrill raced down her spine and settled in her stomach, where it burned with a feverish impatience. She'd never been as attracted to man as she was to the one in front of her. Her heart leaped in her chest when he agreed to walk her home. This was going a lot better than she'd thought it would. Of all the people pushing through the crowd, all the pretty faces and low-cut shirts, and she was the one that had managed to grab the Peace-Keeper's attention. She felt so giddy, it was hard to maintain the illusion that she was a lost, vulnerable girl. With luck, it wouldn't matter much longer anyway. They'd be alone together somewhere, hopefully a bed, with their clothes scattered everywhere. Calm down, she told herself. There were plenty of things that could still go wrong. It was best not to get too excited, only to get let down.

Any other night, Sicily would have been stuck with the same old boys. The barely-over-twenty men, mindless workers on fishing boats that just wanted to get lucky before they headed out again in the early morning. Sicily was sick of rough hands and the smell of fish pervading the sheets. For once, she wanted to wake up in the morning with something a bit nicer than the lingering smell of rotting fish. Sometimes she wondered why she put up with those men at all. It couldn't be too hard to find someone that didn't fish for a living, could it? Sure, it was District Four's industry, but there were other jobs, too. Shops needed owners and workers, bars needed wenches, diners needed cooks and waitress. Unfortunately, Sicily had very rarely encountered people that fell under one of these categories.

Try as she might, Sicily could squash down fantasies of what could very soon be her reality. Just because the Peacekeeper had offered to walk her home didn't mean anything. But he had checked her out, of that she was certain. Sicily had been checked out enough that she knew what it looked like. She also knew how to make it look like she hadn't noticed. Wetting her lips with her tongue, Sicily lifted her head and looked up at him. His eyes, just as she thought, were beautiful. Someone else might have thought them plain, but to Sicily, they were extraordinary. She was determined to find no faults with him. How could someone that looked as perfect as him have a single fault?

Sicily blinked slowly a few times, trying to send a message that said she wasn't really lost, she just wanted to go somewhere quiet with him, and possibly stay there for a very long time. She wasn't sure if it worked, but based on past experiences, it didn't. Usually when she tried to tell guys things with her eyes, they took as permission to stick their hand up her shirt, even when she was trying to tell him that he was disgusting and his mouth tasted like onions. Maybe, for once, her look would work. She doubted it, but right now, she was too happy to care. "Thank you so much!" she said, perhaps a bit too enthusiastically. Then, just because she liked to know who she was sleeping with, "This is totally embarrassing, but I don't think I know your name. I'm Sicily, by the way. Not that it matters, right?" She brushed a lock of hair out of her face, accidentally swiping a finger near her left eye in the process. She started to reach for the small mirror in her purse to check if she'd smudged it, but decided against it. She didn't want to look vain. Instead, she left it, hoping she hadn't messed up her eyeliner. It would just be too embarrassing to have sex with such a beautiful man only to discover her make-up looked like it would fit in better on a clown's face.

Sicily O'Shea

I tried my best but it just wasn't the same.

Cassius. It was a beautiful name, one that fit him entirely. She repeated it in her head a few times, determined not to forget it. She was terrible at remembering names. Faces were much easier, and far more unique. It was rare that she found someone who fit their name as well as Cassius's did. She doubted she'd forget his name, but she had to at least try to remember. If she acted like it didn't matter, she'd be that much more likely to forget.

Cassius brushed his thumb along Sicily's cheek, and for a moment, she thought he meant in a romantic way. Or at the very least, a sexual way. But then she realized he was just wiping away the makeup she'd smeared. Her face turned red as she realized she'd probably looked like an idiot for few seconds, walking around with her face messed up. She should have just whipped out the mirror, not caring what the Head Peacekeeper would think. If she'd done that though, he never would have touched her. It was worth it, she decided.

Sicily knew the time was approaching to make her move. If she waited much longer, she'd miss her chance. If Cassius was expecting something - and at this point, she had no idea - she had to make it clear that it she was interested before he decided he wasn't. If she did it too soon, she'd appear desperate. Even though that was the truth, she still didn't want to make it obvious. She didn't want this opportunity to slip through her fingers. Cassius was easily the most attractive man she'd ever seen. How had she never noticed him before, or at the very least heard other people talking him. Well, she'd heard people talk about Peacekeepers plenty. But she'd never heard anyone mention that there was someone as fine as Cassius in their midst.

As the time to speak drew closer, Sicily wracked her brain for a good line. Was there something she could say to a Peacekeeper to show that she wanted more from him than just an escort home? She'd have to be careful she didn't say anything that would make him angry or would be grounds for arrest in the case that he didn't want the same things she did. An alley was approaching, and while it wasn't her place of choice, in the circumstances, it might do. She'd had sex in alleys before, with men far less appealing than Cassius. Surely this would be more pleasant than with all those other men.

"You don't have to take me home," she said, silently cursing the tremor in her voice. It came from nervousness, not excitement. This was the part she hated. The moment when she could do no more, and it was all up to the other person. All that was left was to wait for him to say something. There wasn't anything else for her to say, but she continued anyway. When she was nervous, she had a tendency to ramble on, even when she'd already said enough. "You could just leave me here. I'm sure I can find the way. Or..." She trailed off, not daring to say the words. She stared at Cassius for a few seconds, then reminded herself that she didn't care. She didn't care what other people thought about her. She just had to go out and say it. "Or we could do something else."

She'd meant to say something smart and witty, but that was what had come out instead. She closed her eyes tightly, angry at herself. She'd messed this up. She'd said the wrong thing, and now it was over. There was no way he'd want her now. He probably thought she was a stupid schoolgirl that liked to flirt with danger, or that she'd been dared to do this by her friends. Opening her eyes, she shook her head and looked down at her feet. "Screw it." Shaking her head again, she started walking away. There was no way to salvage this. If he wanted her badly enough, he'd come after her. But Sicily knew that the odds of him wanting her as much as she wanted him were small. So she decided to just give it up.

Sicily O'Shea

I'm done with this half way love
that I'm here right in the middle of
and all I'm asking is to give me more,
more than this heartbeat.

When he grabbed her arm and pulled her into the alley, a smile split across Sicily's face. She'd get what she wanted after all, it seemed. Her heart beat fast at the strength of his grip. In the dark of the alley, she doubted he could see her face, as she could see his. But she'd still enjoy this. If she didn't, it would have to mean something was wrong with her. One couldn't possibly walk away from Cassius Clayburn without being changed in some way. This was going to be it. the night she finally had sex with someone that she actually really liked, even though she had no reason to other than his looks.

Her back hit the rough wall of one of the buildings that made up the alleyway. Cassius's lips brushed against Sicily's ear. She could barely contain the shiver that rippled across her skin. When his lips touched her skin again, for real this time, she didn't try to stop the sigh that floated from her lips. So far, so good. Some other guys she'd been with had no idea how to kiss. Even when they were just kissing her hand, they drooled on her and managed to lick her in what was supposed to be a sexy way, but ended up just being very disgusting and annoying.

Since she still wasn't entirely sure that Cassius knew she wanted this - from his words, she guessed not - she kissed him back, aiming for the lips. It was too dark for her to aim properly, so she may have ended up kissing him somewhere else entirely. It didn't matter, really, as things progressed and it became increasingly obvious what was about to occur. Sicily wasn't sure what to think about what was going on. The only thing she knew for sure was that this was very different than any other experience she'd ever had. And of that, she was glad.