Could this be love? or is it just Hate?(Steffenee)
Feb 29, 2012 6:27:15 GMT -5
Post by kiah on Feb 29, 2012 6:27:15 GMT -5
I've been crying for so long,
fighting tears just to carry on,
but now, but now, its gone away,
The night swooped around him. Welcoming him with opening arms. But to most people the arms you should be afraid off. Like walking into church cursing the lord. But Stallion had nothing to be afraid off. He waited for death. He waited to burn in hell, but there was on string that held him on this earth. Bella. She had a hold on him. One that he never could imagine was possible. She had turned his life around. For the better. But when she wasn’t around… he could feel himself turn around, like he was being sucked back into the world of darkness. Back to his world of anger. Suffering. Sadness. The world where he deserved to be. he deserved to feel all the regret. Everything that had happened was his fault. All his…
The starts didn’t shine in the sky Stallion. Why would they? They were sings of good. Signs that meant new life or the remembrance of life you just lost. Life of lost ones. They didn’t shine night for Stallion. Stallion was like the Devil. He scared the stars away. Scared them into hiding. He was not a person you wanted to get mixed up with. Be burned; hurt anyone that would disagree with him. With only one exception. Bella. Bella had stood up to him. She had shown him that he wasn’t as scary as he seemed. She had shown him so much. But yet being away from her tonight had had its toll on him. Unwanted memories had swarmed into his mind, filling him with all the emotions that made up a bad person. Hate. Anger. Revenge. All emotions mixed into one big storm. It was mayhem. All thpse emotions bombarded him tonight.
Looking up into the dark sky tonight, Stallion could feel these emotions stirring through him. Waiting a chance to be released. To make an appearance. Someone who could challenge them. they wait eagerly. Stallion could feel them. he had to hold back. He had to. For Bella… For himself. he walked slowly over to the pier in front of him. Dark empty. Just the way he wanted it. What was the chance of him running into anyone out here? At this time of the night? On this gloomy unwelcoming night?
Why was he out here tonight? That was a question he didn’t even know the answer of. He just wanted some air, he had had a rough night. Dreams had haunted him, creating the deep bags that surrounded his tired eyes. But being out here… wasn’t helping him. Why had he chosen this place? this place was full of horrible, horrible memories. And yet here he was. He knew deep down why he was here. He was regretful. To all those people who had died… died because of his selfish. Foolish, actions. Slowly he realised the tears had formed in his eyes. He had become so soft. He had become a man. Not a revenge craved monster. Yes the people of the District were still scared of him. You can’t change a reputation you have built for yourself. But the one person the trusted you. Believed in you. Well that person was special.
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He could feel the bags of his eyes pull down on him. He knew he looked like a wreck. He hadn’t slept at all last night, and now he was paying for it. The nightmares had swarmed him, scaring all his happiness away. But he felt himself brighten at the thought of Bella. Her beautiful golden blonde hair. Her breath taking smile. Her cheeky laugh. All these thought brought the usual happy smile to his depressed face, making him look a bit younger. Before he meant Bella he had been a revenge craved monster, now he barely noticed those dark thoughts. Thoughts that had turned him into that monster. Life had finally fallen into a path for him. A path that was full of happiness. He loved the presence of her. she made him happy, in a way no one else could.
Today walking in the streets he could feel that happiness radiate off him in waves. Waves that were contagious to the people around him. They would smile while they walk past, and then realise who they smiled at, before scarring away in fear. He knew he could never really be happy living here, here in District 4. But for now he was. He had Bella. But soon all these people… he wouldn’t be able to stand their accusing stare. Sometimes… just sometimes, he wished he could return to his old ways, bashing randoms on the streets. But then he would look to the ground ashamed. H would remind himself he was a good man, well the best he was gonna get, before he turned his thoughts to a more positive thought.
He knew he was going to see her today, and his heart skipped a beat at the thought, but when was he? He wasn’t sure and the that was the exciting thought, he thought a smile painted on his face.
[ooc=so sorry it's rubbish... it's long but boring DD:]