Keep me in your Pocket [Cici]

REVERIE FOSCO

Reve Fosco stared down at the ground, daring never to look around at the faces near her. She let the wind tug at her gingery-brown hair; she didn’t need people seeing her face as she walked past them. She folded her arms, a certain coldness suddenly radiating from her heart. She knew people would sense it soon enough; they knew better than to disturb her. Reve had a head full of thoughts, but never dreams. Dreams were merely symbols of hope; they were just fantasies that would never reach reality. Reve would know; she had quite a head on her shoulders.

Her beliefs died with her heart.

Reve kept walking, heading home from school. Next year, she would have the chance to enter college. The thought excited her, for science was her true passion. Science helped her get her mind off of all the trivial concerns and questions that only made life more difficult. Science somehow made life so much more bearable. The best part: science was real. It wasn’t a dream, nor a fantasy. It was plain real, never doubtful. Science was the only thing on this planet that could be trusted.

Since she was a young girl, Reve had seen her parents become successful in the science industry. Had the Capitol not been supporters of their works, it wouldn’t have been unlikely for Reve’s family to have ended up in a fair amount of debt.

REVERIE FOSCO

Reve clenched her fists as the girl escaped, swearing softly under her breath. She was ready to start running after her, until she heard the words that nearly broke her.

REVERIE FOSCO

Reve looked around at the mess of items that the girl seemed to be throwing at her. Had she really stolen this much? Was she really this dangerous? Reve took a single step back, seeing that glistening malicious look in the girl's eyes, the same look that Tegan had always seemed to posess. It was suddenly too much for Reve to handle; she needed Tegan out of her head.

She recalled one time, the first time she had caught Tegan stealing, so vivid in her memory, when Tegan was only nine. Her sister had walked through the door, an inch of suspicion planted on her face. "Where have you been?" Reve had asked. She had been home from school for nearly an hour by then. "Oh, nowhere," had been Tegan's response. "Are you sure?" Reve had asked, suspicion clouding her mind. She had been positive her sister was up to something. "Of course I'm sure! Now leave me alone! Get away from me!" There had been a horrified look on Reve's face at that moment; she remembered how stunned she had been at her sister's words, the girl who she had once called her best friend. "So then, where'd that watch come from?" Reve had whispered, so soft that Tegan hadn't even heard. She didn't even want to imagine, what Tegan would have done, had she known Reve's suspicion at that moment. That had only been the first moment, of many.

Tegan had been smart enough to catch on. Tegan had tried to kill her.

Now Tegan was gone.

The question was: did this girl really deserve Tegan's fate? Oh, yes she did. She was a theif, a liar, and so much worse. She deserved to be turned in, Reve knew. Yet, at the same time, the remorse that Reve felt, somewhere deep down, was enough to change her mind. The memories of the happy, joyful Tegan, were just as equal to the bad ones. Thinking of this, Reve knew there was no way she could turn this young girl in--not in this condition. She was hungry beyond sickness. She needed care from someone: a doctor, like her parents or even Reve, herself. The girl at least needed a few scraps of food. Reve still wasn't sure whether she regretted turning Tegan in; she wasn't so sure she wanted to go through that again.

Conversely, Reve thought, this was the girl's punishment. Reve glared back at her, as she knelt there on the cold, filthy ground. Reve spotted her own money out of her peripheral vision, only a few feet away. Somehow, she didn't feel the urge to grab it; the money didn't have much meaning, not then and there. What mattered was the fact that this girl needed to learn her lesson. The girl's cold glare almost made Reve laugh; did she really think she was intimidating? Reve smirked in return.

She had won this fight, and in fact, she could do whatever she pleased now. She could report the girl to the peacekeepers, she could take all of the stolen articles and run off with them…or she could give the girl food, get the girl to a doctor, and help her out. Fact was, Reve didn't have enough heart to help this girl out; but she wasn't heartless enough to let her die in the streets either. The answer was at the tips of Reve's fingers. She wanted to play around and have her own fun, for a change.

Reve squatted low, until she was level with the girl on the ground. She was barely holding up now; it seemed like she was about to faint. Reve wondered how long it would take until she did. Or worse, how long would it take until she full-out starved? Reve couldn't help but notice the lines under the girl's eyes, the hollowness of her face, the way her stomach seemed to cave in, and the extreme skinniness of her arms and legs. It brought a wave of pity to Reve: a wave of pity that passed quickly. Reve put a hand under the girl's chin, lifting it slightly, so that she could see her eyes clearly. Reve was choked up for a second. She could almost see Tegan's ghost, wound up in the young girl's eyes. Reve quickly disguised her feelings with words.

"Stop pretending like you know people, like you can just take things from them, and it will all be okay. Because quite honestly, you're not the only one suffering. Reve's voice was soft, but cold. Her words were sharp, and her eyes were glistening with hatred. Reve took her hand away from the girl's chin, removing her glare. Something was killing Reve, from the inside. Immediately she stood up, rummaging through her jacket pocket. The girl had stolen from her pants' pocket, but somehow, she had failed to try the pocket of Reve's jacket. That's where she had the real value.

Reve pulled out a granola bar and took a few steps back. Nothing special, but definitely important to this girl. Wherever Reve went, she always had food. She was naturally hungry all of the time; she needed to know that she had at least some food in her pocket. And in this case, Reve had an advantage, a major advantage. She had exactly what the girl wanted. However, she knew she wasn't heartless enough to torture her with the bribe. She would give it to the girl, but only if she worked for it. "You could have just asked," Reve said, swinging the granola bar between her fingers so the girl could see. She held it a little higher, until it was at a height the girl would have to jump for.

The only way this girl would get it, was if she got off the ground, took a few steps, leaped for the divine object in Reve's hands, and lastly, apologized. "Apologize and you can have it," Reve said, still holding it fairly high in the air. If she wanted it, if she was that starving, she would do it. She would prove she was strong enough. Reve knew what she was doing was cruel, especially if this girl barely had any strength left to even get up, but she wanted to know...how much she really wanted it.

At the same time, Reve knew her cold words were only covering up for the pity she was still feeling. She was tired, tired of everything. She was tired of liars and thieves, but most of all, Reve was tired of those daunting thoughts that filled her head. She was tired of fear, of seclusion. She was tired of seeing so much happiness, but not knowing its meaning in her own heart. Reve missed her heart; she wanted it back, but she was fully aware of just how hard getting it back would be.

OOC--I am so so so sorry; this post is WAY overdue! And sorry, it kinda sucks :/

REVERIE FOSCO

The feeling of the girl’s icy hands brought a quick shiver down Reve’s spine. The girl was shaking as she reached for the granola bar. Inside, Reve could feel herself breaking down. The girl’s attitude had done it: it had brought Tegan back to life, back into existence. Suddenly, that was all that mattered; it was all that was left. Tegan, the girl who had been away for so long, driven out by Reve herself, was now back to visit; or rather, to stay.

It was like this little girl knew exactly what words would tick Reve off; it was as though she knew exactly how to manipulate the voices in Reve’s heads: the ones that called her guilty or lazy or inhumane. This little girl was doing more than she realized; she was using Reve’s own thoughts and memories against her. She was bringing back that sense of anger and frustration that Reve knew much too well. Reve wanted to scold the girl for her ignorance; she wanted to argue against her words. How could the girl actually think Reve was living a perfect life? Just because she wasn’t a starving kid roaming the streets, didn’t mean she had any sheer bit of joy in her heart. What Reve lacked was compassion. That was what she was starving for. Not food. Humanity.

Then suddenly, the girl muttered, “Let go of their food…please.” Reve almost lost her balance when she heard the word please escape the girl’s mouth. A tear trickled down the girl’s cheek. Was there really something sensitive about her: something that differed from her stubborn attitude? Reve relaxed her arm a bit, bringing her other hand up to the girl’s face. Gently, she wiped the girl’s tear away. “Don’t cry,” she whispered softly, her heart beating with some sort of sorrow-like feeling, something close to sympathy, but not quite. She let her fingers unlatch themselves from the granola bar, so that it fell into the girl’s hand.

It was seven-year old Reve Fosco all over again: the little girl who started crying when she accidentally stepped on a ladybug, the little girl who had dreams to be a doctor like her parents, and most of all, the little girl who cared for her sister more than anyone on the planet. Reve could recall crawling into her sister’s bed at night, just to eliminate the loneliness she felt when she slept by herself. She remembered holding the young girl’s hand the first time they walked to school together. Reve had been everything a younger sister could have ever asked for, but somehow, that hadn’t been nearly enough for Tegan.

Reve stumbled backwards, memories engulfing her. Suddenly, she was caught up in a sea of nostalgia, the waves drowning her, pulling her under. For a few minutes, she forgot herself; she forgot where she was. The memories were too strong by now. Why did Reve have to go through this? What was life trying to do to her: get revenge? She didn’t deserve this, did she? Life was playing games with her head: games she definitely had no desire to play.

~~~~~~

It was late in the night. Reve was in her room, tucked under her warm covers, gazing up at the ceiling above her. Her eyes were nearly closed, on the brink of sleep. She relaxed, letting sleep wash over her. Rolling onto her side, she began breathing deeply. Silence was enough to rock her to sleep; she didn’t need music to do that for her. Reve was just about to shut her eyes, when she heard a shout. The words were muffled, but loud, reverberating. Another shout came after that, and then more. It were her parents, fighting again. For a few moments, Reve lay there, unable to fall asleep. She had no one: her sister was slowly growing apart from her and her parents…they spent day and night arguing over every little thing.

Reve felt tears at the back of her throat, and she gasped for air. In only a moment, she heard her door click open. She sat up, squinting as a small girl treaded into the room. “Reve?” She whispered quietly. “Can…can I sleep with you tonight?”

“Of course,” Reve said, moving over to let her sister slip into the bed. The girl was shaking in fright. She was ten; although Reve still saw her as the joyful little five-year old she had once been. The two of them were only three years apart. To Reve, it seemed like so much more.

There wasn’t a lot of room in Reve’s bed, but Tegan seemed satisfied. A wave of nostalgia hit Reve square in the face, as she remembered the times they used to do this every night. Reve would always crawl into Tegan’s bed, the bigger of the two, when she felt lonely during the night. It was like a childhood tradition that had slowly faded away as they grew older.

But here they were, little children again. The atmosphere was filled with Tegan’s quick breathing, until she finally spoke. “Reve…I’ve done bad things.”

Reve could still here the echoes of their parents’ arguments. She didn’t know how to respond. The next moment, tears were falling down Tegan’s face, and she had lost it; she had lost herself. Reve sat up and flicked the light on, Tegan at her side. She wrapped her arms around the girl: the sister she had spent years protecting. Things had changed but quite honestly…some things would always be the same. “Don’t cry,” Reve whispered, wiping the girl’s tears away. Her sister leaned her head gently on Reve’s shoulders, and in that moment, Reve knew that everything would be okay. Her sister still loved her; and nothing could ever change that.

~~~~~~~

Reve gazed back at the girl; it was painful just looking into her eyes. It made her feel lonely, like she had nothing to hold onto anymore. It made her remember the past, the past she had lost. Reve crouched down to pick up the dollar bills that lay at her feet. She let the paper slip around in her fingers, her grasp loose and uncoordinated. She picked them up and stuffed them into her pocket.

Then, she gazed back at the girl. Pity coursed through her. She was sick of betrayal; she was sick of the tricks she had played with herself, the things she had gotten herself to believe. But that didn’t mean she couldn’t give someone a fraction of her trust. As long as she didn’t give herself all away, as long as she kept her independence, it would be okay, wouldn’t it?

“You don’t know my story. You can't judge me,” Reve whispered, not necessarily in frustration or accusation, but rather in a casual way. Reve took a few steps forward, until she was closer to the girl. “Come with me,” she said spontaneously. She knew that even if she did hate this girl, even this girl had done nothing good to her, Reve was the daughter of two doctors. There was no way she could let this girl die here, even if she was heartless. “You're not healthy...I can help.”

Reve couldn’t believe those words had just slipped out of her mouth. But there was something about the girl that gave Reve her protective instinct. She knew she was only sweeping herself into another Tegan situation; though somehow, the nightmares of Tegan seemed less important right now. Tegan was gone. She was just a memory. She didn’t need to keep Reve from living her life.

So Reve waited for an answer.

REVERIE FOSCO

Normally, seeing someone hurt was never a big deal to Reve. Working as a medical assistant for her parents, she saw quite a few injured or sick people just on a daily basis. In fact, Reve liked healing people: not really the “doing something for the world” part, but the adventure and the science involved in it. That’s who Reve was: a scientist. In her world, feelings didn’t really matter. Feelings were much too overrated. Sure, you had to have feelings once in a while, but most of the time, they just led to destruction.

But this case didn’t involve feelings. It involved life or death. Okay, maybe not to that severity, but it did indeed involve the health of this girl. It didn’t matter whether she deserved the help or not. Reve was a girl with dreams of being a doctor, so there was no way she could leave this scene.

Then again, she remembered the last few words that had come out of the girl’s mouth before she had fallen. She didn’t seem ready to accept any apologies, or give any for that matter. For a moment, Reve considered walking away. Walking away would solve everything, wouldn’t it? She would never have to deal with this ridiculous girl again, she would probably end up dying from blood loss, and there would be no proof that Reve had done anything.

Reve felt uncomfortable as she thought of this. Sure, the girl had done it to herself; Reve hadn’t been involved in the injury in any way, but still, she had a responsibility as a future doctor. Doctors didn’t walk away from the scene because they didn’t like their patient. They removed their feelings from their head completely and did what had to be done.

So that’s exactly what Reve decided to do. Taking a deep breath, she knelt down next to the girl, observing the flow of blood. She didn’t want to use a tourniquet: not yet at least. It didn’t look nearly that bad. Then again, Reve knew she would just have to see. Quickly, she pulled her fleece jacket off, putting it up to the girl’s shoulder and then applying pressure. The blood seeped through, but Reve continued applying pressure. Then, she tied the jacket around the girl’s shoulder as tight as possible.

Reve shivered, the icy Winter atmosphere finally getting to her. She knew that it wasn’t the blood loss that would kill this girl: the blood flow wasn’t terribly heavy. It was the starvation that was the issue. Quickly, Reve pushed the girl up, so that her shoulder was elevated, leaning against the wall of the building next to her. Then, she took the granola bar, a foot away on the ground, and undid the wrapper as swiftly as possible. She wasn’t sure how this girl would react to food, but she definitely needed it.

“You need to eat this,” Reve said, but she could tell the girl was too weak to do so on her own. So, reluctantly, Reve did it for the girl, forcing small portions into the girl’s mouth every few seconds. She looked back over at the girl’s shoulder. She took the soaked crimson red jacket from the wound, just to see what it looked like. It was still bleeding, but not as badly. Maybe it was dying down. Quickly, Reve tied it once more and then waited for the girl to finish chewing.

For a moment, she had almost forgotten where she was, or even what she was doing. It was as though she had pressed a button that had turned on her doctor-mode. Was there an off button anywhere? Because Reve knew it would be a relief to just stop now. However, out of pure instinct, she knew she had to keep working. What else could she do though?

Quickly, words poured out of Reve’s mouth: words without meaning, words that were only there for the purpose of being informational, not emotional. “Both of my parents are doctors. So unless you want to lay here and die, you’d better trust me.” Reve glanced coldly into the girl’s eyes. She wasn’t actually seeing anything, nor was she looking for anything. She was merely just waiting: waiting for some sort of reaction.

“I can carry you there if you’re too weak to walk.” Reve noticed how out of place those few words sounded. She immediately realized, she had said them out of pity. Pity: the one thing she always seemed to lack around patients. Reve looked back at the girl’s shoulder. It seemed as though as though the blood loss had stopped. As much as Reve wanted to relax, she knew she couldn’t. Not yet.

For a moment, Reve was distracted. She wondered if her parents would be proud of her for taking the initiative to try and stop the blood flow and save this girl. Of course, there wasn’t much you could do without medical supplies, but that’s why she needed to get this girl to her parents. They would be proud, she knew. They would see her dedication, and that’s all Reve really wanted.

She felt a slight smile creeping onto her face. Maybe it was a good thing that she had met this girl after all. She had provided her with a chance to show her parents that she could be a successful and dedicated medical worker. First, though, Reve just needed to get home. So, she looked back to the girl’s large brown eyes, waiting for her consent.


OOC: So, sorry I haven't posted in this since...well...a long time ago. But decided I really wanted to continue this thread, if you still want to. Haven't RPed much in a while, so my writing's a little crappy, but ta-da anyways! ^^

REVERIE FOSCO

The struggle in her eyes was obvious. She didn't want to appear weak—which was honestly, something that also troubled Reve constantly—but this girl was twelve. If she didn't realize that she was about the tiniest little thing Reve had ever seen, then she didn't know what weak was. “Yeah,” the young girl finally said, and Reve rolled her eyes in a joking manner. Finally, she had given in.

A smile flickered across the young girl's face, and for a moment, Reve wondered if it was real.