.the /end/ of time. {Leskor AU}

Lethe Turner

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It wasn’t unusual for Lethe Turner to wake in the middle of the night, gasping for breath. Even before the Games, Lethe found herself thrust from her sleep and into the cruel night, chest heaving, eyes wide as she swung her hand over to her nightstand to retrieve the photograph there. Then, she’d agonize over it for hours on end, trying, trying to hard to make sense of the sea of white before her to, recognize the girl who sat next to her, that was Lethe, she knew that was Lethe Turner, herself, but the girl next to her. They said this was her family and she believed it…almost. Which was the boy she’d taught to ride just a few days ago? Which one, which one?

It’s been years since the Games where Lethe didn’t sleep at all, waiting silently for death to befall her, but that photo was still on her nightstand in her new room in the Victor’s Village. The same as it had always been. Propped up against her lamp, smiling out at her as she slept. Except, one face had been whited out by her mother.

The face of a monster, it was.

No longer did Lethe wake to grab for it, but rather to throw it aside, a terrible reminder that her dear, confused mother, denial, always in denial she was, would pick up and replace without a word. Now, Lethe woke for different reasons. For the nightmares that plagued her since she heard her name called out to a silent crowd. “Lethe Turner!” The blood that poured into her mind, drowning her. The screams that deafened her, the silver blades that literally blinded her and sometimes, Lethe would be standing in a crowded room, crying and screaming, but no one heard her, just fussed over her hair, always perfect, her make up, rosy cheeks, bright green eyes, smile, Lethe smile, look pretty, dear![/i] and her posture, sit up, Lethe, sit up, and smile, laugh, don’t look so sad, my dear, my Victor, you’re a Victor, you’re here, smile![/i]

Lethe Turner hadn’t smiled for real since Eden had been born and before that, not since before the Games. Sometimes, Lethe just wanted to carry out those dreams and instead of smiling like they told her, scream and cry and maybe, just maybe they’d notice. Lethe may have lived, but twenty three other children didn’t and under their weight, Lethe ached.

Tonight, Lethe wasn’t in the Arena, nor was she in the room, but rather in some kind of funhouse. The last time she’d visited the Capitol, she’d taken Eden. She was walking and talking and Lethe couldn’t bear to be without her and there was still that hope, that small hope…but Lethe had brought Eden to a thing called a fair. Fairs in District Five, with a few stalls and one or two street performers, were nothing compared to the Capitol’s and the two had gorged themselves on cotton candy and Lethe had gotten Eden every single one of the stuffed animals that she pointed to and whined about. However, just as the day was drawing to a close and Eden was yawning and burying her blonde hair into Lethe’s neck, they came across the funhouse. And had an escort, who had been deployed to make sure Lethe didn’t run herself into situations like this and cause a scene, not been there, Lethe just might’ve brought Eden inside. It was only then did Lethe learn what a funhouse contained and shivered in hour.

But, tonight, she dreamed of it. Mirrors, mirrors everywhere. Surrounding her. A maze of them and for miles and miles, Lethe Turner stood, staring at herself in horror. And miles and miles away, Lethe formed and quivering and changed. Her claws grew sharp and long and eyes widened and widened, bloodshot, bloody face, matted hair, blood, blood everywhere. It covered her hands and coated the mirrors and she screamed and screamed.

Monster. Monster. Monster.

And finally, Lethe was able to tug herself from the dream, gasping for breath, in horror, the monster from her slumber. For a long time, Lethe sat up on her elbows, her chest heaving, tears dribbling from her eyes, both the real and fake one. She tried to pant it all out, sweat it all out, all of the poison, but it was like a virus. It never left. They never left.

And just like that, Lethe became vaguely aware that she wasn’t alone. And when she slowly raised her eyes from her pale, trembling hands, she gasped. “Razor, Saskia.”

They sat on the edge of her bed, celestial beings and Lethe’s heart soared. Saskia was lovely as ever, the same brown-haired girl that Lethe could finally recognize and no longer did it appear that her eyes were blank. And there was Razor. Death had softened his fierce looks and this time, he actually smiled at her and Lethe knew she should be scared, but instead, their appearance put her at ease and her churning stomach relaxed and her fingers stopped quivering at once and now, Lethe found an urge to reach out to them and just feel their skin one last time…but, the more she reached, the farther away they seemed until they were at her bedroom door. “No wait!” Lethe cried, heart racing for she couldn’t bear to lose them again. Not again. Throwing her blankets away, Lethe rose from her bed and followed them out of the door, in some sort of trance that knew she was dreaming, she had to be, but for once, it tasted so sweet.

The hallway wasn’t as she remembered it, but rather hot and dry, the ground parched under her feet and as she walked, her rippling nightgown turned into cargo pants and her bare feet became clasped in boots and her hands pushed away shrubs and branches eagerly. She knew where she was and it was a black stain on her heart, but with their bodies just whipping out of sight in front of her, Lethe felt safe.

And finally, she caught up with them in a clearing of the first jungle they met and her shirt was bloodstained with Anya’s fluids when she fell before them on that cracked ground, not sure whether to smile or sob. “Oh my goodness,” she found herself gasping out, her lips moving so quickly, forming soundless words, all the words she could find, but none of them audible until finally, she was able to swallow hard and cry out, “you’re here! You’re here! I…I…I,” she faltered, her voice lowering and again, her eyes found her bloodied hands that sent shivers galloping down her spine, “I have so much to tell you.”[/size][/color][/blockquote]