What Makes You Strucken / Kiah

No! This can't be happening! I break down on the floor of the Justice Building despite the peacekeeper's looks at me. I've bet they've seen this before, kids breaking down in the middle of the Justice Building just to cry. I hope that I wasn't the only, or else these peacekeepers would probably think I'm a weakling. I didn't want people to think of me like that, but I couldn't help it. The tears stream don't my face, and I cover them with my scarred hands. I look back up at the peacekeepers, and they look annoyed. I quickly collect myself back up by getting up, one tear straying from my eye. "Follow me." The Peacekeeper orders, practically dragging me up to the velvet room. I made sure to flatten up my dress, and actually make myself presentable and not like I just had a huge break down in public. "Sit down." They order me as soon as they winded me through the many halls of the Justice building and into the room I finally sit down, taking deep breathes, tears strolling down my red stained face. The peacekeepers close the doors behind them, and it's like they activate a trigger, because I instantly break down in tears. I keep on repeating words like 'why me?' or 'oh my god'. Could this be karma? For murdering my sister, I have to be sent into a game for the entertainment of sick people? Could Moti have an influence on this?

I've never really believed in a God, or a Jesus. I found the whole idea very phony. But it just seemed in this circumstance I found myself on the ground of the Justice building, praying to God. "If you let my survive... Please, if you let me survive, I promise to do good for the rest of my life. Please let me win. Please!" I press my arms together, begging as if He were actually there in front of me. "I won't think of killing anybody else. No matter how hard it is. I will become a good person. Please let me survive, God, I'm begging you." My breathing increases and I'm suddenly on the floor, crying. My stomach knots once again but I ignore the feeling, it hurts but I have to get through it. If Moti didn't die, I wouldn't have been in this mess. I'm such a monster. I murdered my own sister, and now I'm going to be murdered. I've never believed in Karma. It seems as if the reaping has opened up my mind... I suddenly believe in God, and now I'm believing that karma is the reason that I was reaped. What have I become? I'm not... me, any more. I'm someone else. "I'm sorry, Moti. I'm sorry Mama, I'm sorry Papa." I say in between the racks of my sobs.

I finally work up myself to get up off of the ground, and walk to the wall, where I punch it. The wall remained still, not doing a thing. I may have enough strength to break a nose but not a wall? I definitely won't survive. Pain rushes through my hand, and I hold it closely to me as if it was a baby and I just dropped it. My body begins to shake again, and I bang my head against the wall, repeatedly. "Let me out of here! Please!" I say to the wall, half-expecting it to open and reveal the other site of it. "I don't want to die... I don't want to die..." I shake my head, wiping the tears from my eyes, walking back over to the couch, wrapping myself back in a ball, blocking myself from the world. My attention is brought to sounds from the door. "She was throwing a tantrum, you can check and see if she's done now." A tantrum? That was hardly a tantrum. I felt like flipping my middle finger at him but I knew that stupid peace-keeper wouldn't be able to see it. The door opens a crack, before it opens up fully, revealing a person on the other side who I don't know. I look up plainly at the person, my face full with no emotion whatsoever.