Knife In My Heart {CLOVER}

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southernbelle96

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Knife In My Heart {CLOVER} Aug 15, 2012 20:21:50 GMT -5

Post by southernbelle96 on Aug 15, 2012 20:21:50 GMT -5

FREEDOM FROM THIS WONDERLAND WILL BE A WONDER TO ACHIEVE

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Thinks
Says
Does

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My eyes snap open to blackness. Just blackness. Before I bolt up with a scream. The night terrors had plagued me once again. It was horrific. Like falling down some horrid hole and then crashing into an unforgiving, wondrous land. A land full of giant monsters that loomed over you.Craving your fear. However, tonight's fit had been different. There were no horrific, nightmarish monsters. There was only one monster that time. And she had been beautiful...

I can recall it slightly. It started by being heckled as always. I was in my current,17 year old form; but being loomed over by the little kids from the Community Home back when I was a child. It was like a flashback. But much worse. They chased be off into a deep, misty forest that I never knew existed in District 1. I had stumbled around, my silvery blonde hair sticking to my forehead as I beat my way through the brush. Then, as always, I found myself falling and spinning down a hole. A hole where screams echoed and hands reached out to snag me. I had always dodged them in my night terrors; because the true horrors happened when I landed...

I had crashed into a field of violet, purple, and pink flowers... It was always beautiful during this point. But then, the petals began to shake. And then I noticed they were actually butterflies that swarmed into a gigantic mass and flew upwards, darkening the sky. Then the horrid things started to happen as I stared in awe of the beauty. I noticed things got even darker. Much darker. For the vibrant colors of the butterflies' started to change to a black like midnight's ink... And then they changed even more. Shrunk, even. For they were no longer butterflies... they were flies. With a horrid buzzing sound that caused me to clench my hands over my ears, they cascaded down and swarmed me. Buzz, buzz, buzz...

Then my eyes opened again. I laid on a black floor... black as onyx. I rose up, as a light flooded down and shined on me. I started to look around. Now that, had been new.What is this about? I had thought. I had brushed a hand through my hair as I stepped forward; and then noticed another ray of light a distance away from me. A figure was standing in that ray of light. A silhouette. I stepped forward another step; my heartbeat had been relaxing at that point. "Hello?" I had called out. No answer. I then stepped forward again, before I found myself rocketed forward and staring into the eyes of the translucent skinned beauty...

I tilted my head, and she had tilted her's in unison. I'm confused at this point. Her hair had waved in contrast to mine which slid down my back. I opened my mouth in confusion before the dagger she pulled out from behind her back pierced my heart. That's when I bolted up in bed, gasping. My hand is clutching my chest now. That was the night terror. I shake my head and sigh as I stare off into the dark room. I feel something inside as I pull my knees to my chest. Today, I wanted to train.

For I would allow no translucent beauty to kill me.

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Last Edit: Sept 27, 2012 5:46:46 GMT -5 by southernbelle96

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Knife In My Heart {CLOVER} Sept 15, 2012 3:39:31 GMT -5

Post by florentine, d4b ❁ on Sept 15, 2012 3:39:31 GMT -5

HOLLYN DEVEREAUX

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When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
(Lights will guide you home)

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★

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Eyelids flutter open, glace toward the clock, and close tight again. Your world goes dark, and nothing but the constant tick, tick, tick to penetrate your thoughts. Today will be different. When the sunlight begins to stream in through the silky curtains, when the rain stops falling long enough for you to sneak out through the backdoor - soon. Just another second, minute, hour. If you can hold my breath for another one hundred counts you will be the best today. None of your siblings will show you up, you wont feel eyes boring into you every time you turn away. Today, you will be pretty enough, strong enough, brave enough. Today. Perhaps this time when you kick out in the sea, your feet will find the bottom. Stand for yourself, little girl - it's about time.

Footsteps on the stairs shake you from the faded, heartless sleep you have found yourself in. The clock still ticking, the rain still beating down on the window as though it will never let up. Words haunt you from long ago, your sister calling to you through the darkness - (Just a little rain, Hollyn, really going to let it stop you?) Just like that, you stand up, pulling on a pretty flowery dress that your Mama provided. Socks, boots, jacket. Day not quite breaking, but close enough. Silently, you pad down the stairs, breathing slowly and carefully. You can do this. One step at a time - tick, tock. Rain in your hair, splattering across your face. Last nights mascara running in streams down your cheeks. Looking as though you have been weeping endlessly, you cross the street. The streetlamp above your head flickers, and you throw your head down, not wanting to be seen. You tried. You're trying. And yet still you're just a sad little girl, the one who always tried too hard. A clatter, as a pocketful of coins goes tumbling onto the street, shimmering circles spinning off in all directions. For a moment, you consider bending town to pick them up, but with your bedraggled hair clinging to your cheeks and the black smudges beneath your eyes, you decide against it. Mama always taught you to be collected, and scrambling on the road for coins is hardly dignified.

You walk the rest of the way with your hands shoved deep in your pockets, shoulders hunched.
The training center. You remember the first time you laid eyes on this place, mouth almost watering with opportunity. This could be your chance - the little girl in the shadows with a dream, you could do it. Perhaps this shining place in the middle of the district, (your entire world, Hollyn) would hold all the answers you are looking for. Here, perhaps, you will shine. And yet you haven't, you wont, you can't. Despite all the pretending and lying to everyone, you are simply not a person with sparkle. The only skills you truly possess, darling, are endless determination and arrogance as well as a quick tongue and too much self worth. Those clothes you wear, what are they now? Thin floral material catching on your pale flesh as you pull away your coat and step inside. Warm. Dry. The desire to curl up in a ball and sleep, let the dreams drag you down claws at your mind, and yet you persevere, pulling a knife from the wall and flinging it at the wall. It lands short, without even grazing the tiles. Blonde hair whips around, making sure that nobody saw you fail. As long as they believe you're worth something, Hollyn, you can keep pretending to yourself.

ooc: sorry, belle, my muse kind of just crashed and burned and I'm really sorry if the above burns your eyes and I'll try harder next time ok ily. also hey we should kind of blitz with little posts like these ones because muse and Hollyn aren't co-operating.

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And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
(Lights will guide you home)

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southernbelle96

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Knife In My Heart {CLOVER} Sept 27, 2012 6:40:26 GMT -5

Post by southernbelle96 on Sept 27, 2012 6:40:26 GMT -5

Alice Poesy

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I, I'll get by
I, I'll survive
When the world's crashin' down
When I fall and hit the ground
I will turn myself around
Don't you try to stop me!
I, I won't cry

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♙

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My hands glides across the slightly dirt layered surface of my bathroom mirror. I scratch a bit off and look at the girl beneath. Her hair has decided to take on a silvery color today, it seems. Her eyes are large, as always, and a pale blue that seems to be off in a wonderland of thoughts. Her face is sharp, delicate, and her neck is long. Her hair waves down her fragile frame. Her skin is clear, with just a bit of dirt caked on here and there. All in all, I was a unique beauty for one so dirt poor. With my slender fingers I tuck a stray strand of silvery blonde behind my ear and turn from the mirror.

My slightly tattered black skirt billows slightly as I turn. I grab the sides of the metal tub I use and drag it outside. Starting my daily routine of things I pour the water from the tub, bring it back into my bathroom, and place it under the sink with a huff. I set my bar of soap on the sink, and take my old clothes and, considering I had dipped them in the bath water before I stepped in, took them outside and allowed them to dry. Funny thing though, as I started to hang the clothes a drizzle of rain started to fall from the ground. Staring slightly at the sky I cursed under my breath. I balled up all of my old clothes in my hands and walked back into my house. I threw them in a corner. Maybe one day I'd be free from this place. Maybe I'd be better off someday. Maybe one day I would be able to survive by more than just the skin of my teeth. I heard whispers of something called an Olympics starting in Panem, for the Career Districts. I was a Career, of sorts. Though I never felt a burning passion to be in the Arena, I still had a fluttering in my chest to enter the Olympics. After all, I couldn't die there. Even if I had a condition, I could push through, couldn't I? Perhaps, if I did the Olympics, I could finally be seen as normal. If that'd ever be possible, at least. I sigh and shake my head, a migraine starting to form. I'll think about it later. I pull my sleeves over my hands and hold my arms over my head as I exit my house.

I don't run nor jog as I head to the Training Center. I walk while the rain patters on me gently. I inhale, the fragments of last night's dream dancing in my head. The translucent skinned beauty. I see her pale blue eyes flash in my head, and stumble a moment. I clutch my head, and urge to migraine to go away. Thankfully it does, and I exhale a silent "Thank you." After a few more moments I enter the Training Center and remove my arms from over my head. I glance around the room. So many Careers. I was like a fly in their presence. I close my eyes and ignore the heckling as I make way to the station that houses my favorite weapon. Twin daggers. Easy enough to use, efficient,deadly, and graceful. Like I would want to be if I was a true Career. I twirl one around in my fingers clumsily before getting a better hang of it. Soon enough I'm gracefully twirling one while holding the other. I stand across from a dummy. I step forward to strike, but a heckle catches me off guard. I slip, and fall. I hit the ground rather hard, and I gasp. They're laughing. But, for once, something inside of me snaps. I'm tired of being the girl who curls up in the corner and gets made fun of. With a huff I bolt up and charge to the forming crowd. "Shut up!" I plead in a loud cry. "All of you," I grab my hair and walk over to where I left one of the daggers and sling it near the feet of the people. It stabs into the shoe of one them, but somehow miraculously misses his foot, "Shut up!" I glance around at all of them. "You all think you're so tough. So brave, so great. Y'know what... I... I challenge anyone who will face me," I go to the guys foot and pluck my dagger out. I weigh it in my hand. "Any takers?" I've never done this before. I usually took the heckling with soft tears. But, it seemed for once in my little life, I was taking charge.

I'll get by...

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Last Edit: Sept 28, 2012 5:45:28 GMT -5 by southernbelle96