Just need to put this out there

So, I'm writing this here because I don't know where else I can say it and I just need to get all of this off my shoulders for the day and then sleep on it and hope I feel a bit better in the morning. And writing helps me think and helps me not stress so hard so I thought I might just try this.

I know that sometimes people make mistakes. It happens all the time - you forget to check the oven and burn the cookies, you forget to brush your teeth before bed, you forget to shut off all the lights before you leave the house, you forget how to finish a math problem ... I mean the list is endless. And so many of those things are easily forgiven. You can bake another batch of cookies or try the math problem again.

But somethings are not so easily forgiven. And you should know well enough when you have to be a responsible person and not screw up. For example, when you are driving a huge vehicle at 60 mph down the highway where other people are also using the road. If you have your license, shouldn't you understand how dangerous it is to drive? It's one of my biggest fears to be completely honest - I am horrified of screwing up when I'm driving, making a mistake, and hurting someone. But I swear some people have no regard to any of this and this is part of why I am ranting I guess.

Today, something horrible happened when I was driving home from school. I was a few cars behind one of the buses (which isn't uncommon, I always get stuck behind them) and being the attentive and frankly stressed out driver that I am, knew that when a buses flashing lights come on and it starts to slow down, that three little girls, one in my younger brother's class, one my little sister's best friend, and the last who is always smiling and saying "Hi." to me in the hallways. When I rode the bus I would always try too keep her entertained by making faces at her. She really is the most adorable thing ever. they all are. These girls live on the highway and get right off the bus and are directly in their driveway. They shouldn't have to worry about cars, right?

But today, someone I know, one of my classmates parents, wasn't paying attention to the bus ahead of her. She swerved to try and miss hitting the back of the bus, trying to go into the ditch on the right side of the road. The bus driver, who I will be thanking later, noticed in his rear view mirror that the car behind him was not slowing down. He grabbed the oldest girl by the arm and got the eldest two to stop before getting off the bus. But the youngest girl wasn't so lucky. She was off the bus, beginning to walk up her driveway and ended up getting hit ... Now, I didn't have the best view of it because I was still quite a ways away when it happened, but I keep playing the image in my head of one of my bus drivers stopping these two little girls and just missing the third one and then of my classmates parent not paying attention and of my principal shooting out of his, breaking his car door just trying to get out fast enough and of course of the little girl who I used to play silly little games with on the bus and I start to cry and shake and I just can't believe it happened.

So the whole point of my ranting and telling you this terrible story: Please, I'm begging you all and everyone else out there, please pay attention when you are driving. It isn't just something you can redo later like a math problem. When you screw up, you just can't take it back. Driving is such a major responsibility, and nothing - NOTHING - is more important than paying attention while you are operating a vehicle.

As for the little girl, I have heard she is doing as well as she could be. Both her legs are broken but she is up and talking, but as we all know, she will forever be scarred for life, as will most of the people in my community by this tragic event.

I would like to ask that all your thoughts and prayers and good wishes go out to this family, and maybe just leave a bit of space in your heart for them if that isn't too much to ask.

I know I will have an assembly at school tomorrow about being attentive when you drive and donation funds for the family and things like that, but you guys are such great listeners and I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep tonight if I didn't say anything and get all these feelings out in words.

Thanks to all of you just for reading and thank you a billion times more for praying for the family and the little girl <33