{Curious} Blues//[ealin/open]

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k!ah
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{Curious} Blues//[ealin/open] Nov 15, 2012 7:08:43 GMT -5

Post by k!ah on Nov 15, 2012 7:08:43 GMT -5

JERROME CORBY

Jerrome feet took him to where it all happened, to where this nightmare all began. To where he lost her. Where he lost his Mother. Slowly he kneeled down next to the tree that claimed her life, where he saw her last living moments. He hadn’t come here before. He had never been here to face his mother. He had just accepted her death, but had he ever let her soul rest in peace?

“Sorry…” His voice shook slightly as he said the word. He had to face his fears, even if it involved reliving the last moments. He had to tell her how sorry he was, then maybe, just maybe he would be allowed to move on, maybe then her face would stop haunting him. Then he could let her sprit rest in peace.

“I-I’m so sorry, I never- I didn’t- I’m just so sorry. I love you mum. I love and I just love you…I’m sorry…” His voice cracked as his last words slipped through his mouth, tears gathering in his eyes. He didn’t wipe them away. He felt guilt swell up in himself. He had treated her like shit, all she had ever done was love him. he had taken her love for granted. And now… and now he had to live with it. He had never had the chance to tell her he loved her. And most of all he had never gotten to tell her he was sorry. He was sorry for so much. But she never heard those words come out of his mouth.

Slowly Jerrome pressed a hand onto the tree, then he brought his hand to his heart, then back to the tree. He held that position for quiet sometime before he pulled away. He tried to gather himself, before he turned away and started the long trek back the way he had come.

• * * * *

Jerrome felt his heart being torn in two with each step. He felt as though he was losing a part of him. But in some way he felt lighter. He felt as though a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Yes he was leaving someone that he loved dearly- but was he really leaving her? Was he truly leaving her? No he would never truly leave her, she will always be with him. In his heart. In his heart is where she lives now. He may not be able to see her, but he knew she was there, and she would be there forever…

His mother wasn’t the only person close to him that he had lost over the last couple of years, only a year ago he had lost someone who was like a sister to him. She had meant so much to him, and yet she was gone too. The Games had taken her life mercifully. Putting her through agony. Jerrome remembers the last time he had saw her, she was as pale as a ghost, but she tried to look strong, for him and Saskia’s sake, but Jerrome hadn’t been fooled. She had been as scared as a fly caught in a trap, knowing that she was going to die. Knowing that is was going to be the last time she was going to see him.

Jerrome fought through all his emotions, trying to pull free on the other side. He hadn’t realised how lost, how detached he had become from the world. He had practically left Saskia on her own-to defend for herself. That was equivalent to setting a lamb into and arena of hungry lions. How could he have been so ignorant? Thinking only of himself. But deep down he knew that he should not blame himself. He had lost two of the closest people to him; he deserved his time to mourn. But that time was now over.

Picking up the pieces,

[/i] isn’t as easy as people make it out to be. Yes you have the pieces but then you have to put them together, you have to make them fit, and bring your life back to earth. Jerrome had never been good at puzzles and this one was the hardest that he had ever attempted. He puts all his effort, all his energy in trying to help his family, but when things get hard he just crumbles, and the pieces that he had managed to put together fly away and he is left with nothing. He has to rebuild his life. He has to start his puzzle again.

Then the cycles starts again.

He had gotten so far this time though, he had said the words that he had wanted for years and now he was on a new road, a new piece of the puzzle, he just had to find where I fits in.
[/blockquote][/blockquote][/size][/justify]

Last Edit: Nov 25, 2012 2:57:23 GMT -5 by k!ah

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ealin
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{Curious} Blues//[ealin/open] Nov 17, 2012 21:28:12 GMT -5

Post by ealin on Nov 17, 2012 21:28:12 GMT -5

… I see right through to you
It's not like I don't feel your mood...

Narration
Others
Speaking
Thoughts

It’s been a quiet day, the sort that just seems to roll by, nothing of import and surely nothing exciting to draw your attention away from the mundane existence of district 8. Normally my mind doesn’t wander much as I work, my thoughts focused on the sketches I’m rendering with a single mindedness that surprises even me at times, but not today. Today my thoughts were bouncing from one thing to the next, and while most involved my new friend Karen, there were still those lingering fears of having let someone get close to me again. I half expected to get myself worked up over but I have to admit, the new sense of… belonging… that came with her friendship has had me feeling a freedom I’d long forgotten what it felt like to experience.

As I stepped out of the textile mill’s design department side entrance, my steps were lighter then usual, the weight and stress no longer weighing me down, a sensation I am rather enjoying. I’m not as observant of my surroundings as usual and as I turn a corner, walk right into a young man who looks about my age. I quickly get spun around and reach out to steady myself, blushing. “I’m sorry…” I feel the heat in my cheeks and my embarrassment doubles as I hold my jacket closed against the breeze and look at him more intently though I don’t mean to possibly make him feel awkward. And while there’s a feeling of heaviness enveloping him, it’s his eyes that make my stomach flip. In those rich dark eyes is a parade of emotions and although I can’t read the stories behind them, I know them.

Pain. Remorse. Guilt.
LOSS.

I’m not entirely sure what to say or do but I know I don’t want to just leave him to walk off without having at least tried to help lessen the sting of pain I see in his beautiful eyes. “It’s… getting rather cold out.” Great, state the obvious, real good Brynn. “I was about to stop in the teashop over there, if you want to join me? My treat?” I nod across the street towards a small shop tucked between weathered brick housing, a teacup shaped sign above the door with lettering faded beyond recognition. “It’s the least I can do for barreling into you.”

And that damned warmth returns to my cheeks and I smile though inside I want to slap the flush clean off my face.

k!ah
Retired Staff

4,636 POSTS
Pronouns: She/Her
last seen Nov 19, 2024 4:03:09 GMT -5

#expensivetrash

{Curious} Blues//[ealin/open] Nov 21, 2012 6:37:08 GMT -5

Post by k!ah on Nov 21, 2012 6:37:08 GMT -5

JERROME CORBY

DREAM AS IF YOU WILL LIVE FOREVER, LIVE AS IF YOU WILL DIE TOMMORROW. Jerrome had never really understood what that had meant, how were you supposed to dream like you lived forever? When there was just so much to dream for. It hurts. It hurts to know that your dreams may never come true. But know he understood. It didn’t mean that everything was going to come true, but it meant to keep your options open, dream as if you will live forever. He had a dream, he had a dream to let his mother rest in peace. He had achieved that dream. It had taken him so long, so very long to understand, but now all the little pieces fell together. Dream big. No matter how difficult the challenge may be. If you have a dream…. You have a purpose in life.

The gentle breeze ruffled his dark shirt. It curled around his body, hugging him tight. He smiled into the breeze, letting it buff his face, feeling it cool presence against his dark features. He loved the wind. It was something that reminded him that he was not alone. To feel the presence of the wind was like feeling the presence of someone with him. some constantly by himself. It reminded him that he was not alone in this world. That these battles he thought… people were with him, guiding him… A smile dances at the edge of his lips threatening to come out and play, but he held it back. Keeping his thoughts to himself.

Slowly Jerrome closed in on a corner. It was a dirty street, that resembled all the streets in district 8. Crowded. Dirty. Dull. And colourless. Just like the rest of the district. Street signs covered in grim and much. The pathways, small and cramped, smelling of trash that people left on the side of the street. There were few places in District eight where you could feel fresh air whip your face, not with the pollution caused by all the factories that chugged away happily, not giving a rats ass about the smell and the muck that they coughed out onto the streets.

Jerrome rounded the corner. Then he came to a stop. He had walked into something, or someone. For a moment Jerrome was really surprised, I mean how could he of misjudged the corner and ran straight into the wall? I mean seriously? Then it dawned on him. He hadn’t misjudged the corner he had hit someone. Ran right into them. An apology formed at his lips, ready to escape, then the girl reached out grabbing the front of his shirt to steady herself. Jerrome was about to pull away from the fright of the movement, he hadn’t expect a hand to reach for him. It made him uneasy. Then she spoke, her face was blushed, a light pink shade painted across her cheeks. Jerrome held in a small smile, at the site of her embarrassment, honestly it was quiet cute. “I’m sorry...”she said, her voice sot and gentle.

Jerrome looked away as she searched his face. He hated discomfort. It was one of his worst fears. That and awkward moments, I mean that’s why there call awkward, because, well they are…

Jerrome managed to drag his eyes back to the girl; she had fiery red hair that flowed over hers shoulders like a wild fire. Her eyes. Dark. Jerrome stared into them, only to find himself lost deep within the deep pools, they seemed to reflect how she felt, glistening with embarrassment. Her voice dragged him out of those pool which seemed to swallow anything and back to the present. Back the girl. “It’s… getting rather cold out.. I was about to stop in the teashop over there, if you want to join me? My treat?” she says gentle nodding over to the small shop next at the corner of the street. Lights lit up the windows, making it seem warm and cosy, also signalling that it was open “It’s the least I can do for barrelling into you.” She added quickly.

Live like you will die tomorrow he recited the quote to himself. Taking a moment to prouder her request, a wide grin spread across his features, turning him from serious and maybe even scary to, mischievous, and looking for fun.

“Actually that sound great,” he says, his face softened into a smile, ”looks warm. Cosy. Just my type of place” He says slyly adding a small wink. He didn’t want to scare her. He just wanted to have some fun. After all. He deserved some right. He deserved to let lose for a while. fun… the word seemed so distant.

[[OOC= okay so I thought i might warn you that next time my post might look a it different, I'm going to change his colours cause right now they are ewww, so they need to be fixed<3