Call Me Crazy[Complete]

~Naida~

Naida froze for a moment of the words of the other girl. She gave it a moment to sink in. Was she really hurting them, by breaking down whenever their names were mentioned? Naida tried to put herself in her brother and Alba's position. And decided, no she wouldn't want them to hurt so badly over her. But she had no clue how to change. Win the Games? It seemed so impossible. Her brother made it to the final two and still died, and he was the strongest person she knew. Shanks and Alba were strong too, and they both died as well. It all seemed so hopeless. What if her little brother was reaped next? He was only twelve. He wouldn't stand a chance. There was no way a twelve year old would win a seconded year in a row... "I can't get them out of my head. And I just don't know how to get back to what I used to be. It's all so far gone..." Her voice crackled when it raised slightly above a whisper.

Nadia asked her to 'show her what she's got,' a bitter voice mocked Naida. What you've got? You have got nothing... The voice angered Naida, she didn't have much, but she had something. Naida quickly scrambled up onto her feet again, and staggered backward on the sand lifting her spear as a hope of protection. "Win the Games? How can I win, when I've already lost?" Naida knew she wasn't making much sense, but nothing made sense lately.

~Naida~

Naida was listening to the other girl carefully. Trying to focus on what she was saying and not the thoughts that always seemed to drag her down into that dark place that there was no escaping from once it had taken a hold of her. Her grip on her spear relaxed a bit, but not enough that she couldn't use it to defend herself at a moments notice. "I've been fighting a losing battle since the Games my brother died in four years ago.... The only thing keeping me from going complete overboard is my younger brother and sister that still need me." She was whispering again, but some of the crazed tone had left. "And I might as well be a stranger to them at this point. I try to turn myself around, and when things start to look up, it all comes crashing down again..."

She knew she couldn't keep watching people she loved die. It was all to much. If the strong lived, and the weak died, like so many people have said. Then why was she still here, while Raiden, Alba, and Shanks, among countless others were dead. It didn't make any sense at all to her. Sense had long since left her. Insanity had taken it place. The kind where you feared the hell that sleep would bring to you. "To rebuild something completely you have to first tear it all down. But what happens when there is nothing left to rebuild it with?" Great, another one of her little phrases that seemed meaning less to other, but made perfect sense to her. She must sound ridiculous right now.