Tessa Raziel Crowne, District 5

I am Tessa R. Crowne. I have long, slender legs, weak, pale arms and a tiny body. Measured at 5'4" and 87 pounds and am incredibly pale. Not so much that my veins can show, that's creepy, but just creamy-pale. I'm not the most elegant person in the world, my way of walking is definitely off. I don't walk the way Capitolites do, one foot in front of the other and head raised so high they look like they're looking at clouds, nor do I walk like someone out of District 12, feet apart, usually lumbered over. I walk like a Tessa R. Crowne would, and I stand straight, except for the fact, my feet form a sort of baseless triangle when I stand. The reason for this, is more or less my false leg. It's actually made of metals, built so I can put weight on it, even run and look like it's my actual leg. Sadly, when I wear skirts or dresses, my leg is almost always stared at awkwardly and it makes me fidget.

I have pretty blond hair. It used to be long, very, very long but, I actually cut it off to be made as wigs for bald children or self-absorbed women or men. My hair now, is about as long as just below my chin, flicking up gently, outwards like little waves pushing off my face. I have little braids carefully done in and scattered here and there, usually an equal distance from each other. I have little side bangs which fall into my eyes at times. My eyebrows are very much a different colour from my hair, though. Dark brown and thin, they don't give me a look of anything but plain and 'cute'. My eyelashes, though maybe hard to see at first, are just as brown at my eyebrows. Content with myself, I find myself twirling my hair around my finger at times.

I have a little nose, rose lips and pale cheeks. My ears are fairly tiny and I really despise my tiny features. But, I'm very much proud of my eyes. One blue, the other green. I get funny looks at times, double checks even. The green, cloudy, yet emerald with a tint of aquamarine somewhere in there. The blue, a smoky blue, very pale. It reminds me of the stormy skies in district 4, at times. My mother said, as a baby, I had brown eyes. She said they changed as I grew up. But, what did that woman know? She was always a liar. I'll never trust her even in my dreams. But, my father always told me I had cute, childish cheeks and, a ski-jump nose. I'm not sure what that means, really, what's a ski jump? I'm fairly sure it's a steep slope that flicks upwards at the end and people use pizzas and fries to go down on it. I was a bit self-conscious about my pizza-and-fries nose.

I have a sort of obsession which has both helped and, unfortunately, ruined my life at different times. My obsession is doromania which, is the obsession of giving gifts. It's helped me in making friends and assisting the poor, unhealthy or homeless but, it hasn't helped me in losing generous amounts of my families money, and giving away precious items, without a second thought. I admit, I'm not the smartest pencil crayon in the tool shed but, I know people like gifts! Of course, I know I'm also rather oblivious about it, as well. I don't usually realize, sometimes people get annoyed by my constant giving or anything else, for that matter. I don't usually notice feelings until it's too late. Sometimes, I don't even realize my own feelings until it's far pasted too late. I'm far too oblivious and absent minded, for my own good. At times, I'll let my curious mind wander and, I go completely off topic. I always tell myself, I just think faster than other people but, I know I just come up with things to stall in for time. I usually stare when I'm wandering off into my mind. I'll occasionally stare into eyes, it's more of a habit than anything.

I also have a rather creative side to myself. Or so, I believe. I may suck at drawing, music and most other things but, I write lyrics and I can sort of sing. I don't have a beautiful, gentle voice that seems like an angel has touched my throat, soul and self but, rather, I have a breathy voice. It may be a little off at times but, I do have a good melody, sometimes. I'm usually a very confident girl, I like to sing even if it's in public. I have a rather positive side to myself, due to my confidence. I depend on it a lot, rather. It helps me find courage, bravery and at times, hope. Now, sadly, I'm also quite clumsy. I am also a bit dramatic. Sometimes, I over exaggerate things a bit too much. For example: I'll fall down and my ankle rolls. I'll probably get very close to tears. I fall over pretty much nothing, too.

Some of my favorite things are colours. I don't really have a preference of them but, any colour works, as long as it's bright. My favorite animal is a bunny because all the other animals in my district seem to either be gone or, rarely seen. Only small animals that can withstand the pollution are around, these days. I hate goodbyes and I love hellos. I've always had a fear of heights, creepy bugs and water. I never try to show my fears unless I trust someone though. I try to act strong, half the time. I love bare feet. For some reason, I like feeling the earth, by myself, not through shoes so, you'll rarely see me ever wearing shoes. Of course, my metal leg usually have padding on the bottom to avoid dirt, because I hate dirt. I respect the capitol, though, and it tends to set me apart. They're just trying to survive. Like a diva, they want the spotlight, and I'm fine with giving them it. I'm usually a rather respectful person. I've always been blind to racism, people afraid of homosexuality and, everything else really. I believe this is a moral of mine I should keep in mind, for everyone deserves second chances.

As a child born into a huge family, my parents didn't always have time to teach me what I needed. They just sent me off to school and expected me to learn. I was always looking for a role model, be it a teacher, sibling or complete stranger. I've always looked up to one person the most though. My oldest sister. She's always helped me, maybe because she took pity to my being born deformed. I had no leg, growing up, I was always in a wheel chair. Finally, my sister actually raised money for my false leg. She spent an entire winter making home made objects. Scarfs, cards for all occasions, anything. She's my hero and, at times, I'll find myself reflecting and thinking; What would she do? When I said I had a big family, I didn't mean literally. We just all love in a big home with other families, about 3-4 of them. But, were all close, like a family. They all seem to have certain personalities. Mine seems to be timid. I was always curious as to why my mommy was always kissing more than one man than daddy. I saw her in a store, in a bathroom, our own house, and many others. But, now I knew. She was always a liar. She'd do it for money, I watched the whole thing once, I cried for days straight, I barely slept for months, it was burned into my brain what my mother was doing.

I could never really hold myself back from giving people gifts. As a baby, giving food, giving hugs, giving my bed, giving my place in the room, giving grass, dirt,eaves, a mouse once, anything you could imagine a child could give. I gave advice when I grew older, taking time to carefully make gifts for my whole class, everyday rather than doing my homework. My worst experience was when I once gave away a precious family item. It wasn't anything important to me, really. It was something my father had given me the day before telling me not to lose it. It was a beautiful necklace, a crown with a feather weaved through it as it's design. I had been rubbing it between my insatiably curious thumb and fingers, when a man approached me. He grabbed my arm and gave me a crooked toothed smile. He asked me where I had gotten it and, I could feel his hands slip around my fingers, squeezing them until they fell off the necklace. He pulled at it, squeezing against my neck. "What a pretty necklace, you have, sweetie." He had said with cigarette breath. I knew he wanted it. Then, I unclasped it from behind my neck and dropped it into his hands, sticking one of the bows I keep in case I want to give a present, which I hide secretly in my pocket, to him. He thanked me and gave me the oddest of side glances, before disappearing, leaving dark coal marks on my fingers from the dirt he probably had rolled awake in. My father had been utterly furious with me, hitting me, telling me it had been priceless and I was a waste.

In the future, I hope to be a teacher. I want to learn more about Panem and it's mysteries. I want to give the gift of teaching kids, something new everyday. I could probably afford to give them little extra gifts, every single day, too. My friends live mostly on the other side of town so, I don't see them much but, I make do of the people around me. Usually, I have never had an issue with making friends. When I was younger, I was bullied a lot because, apparently I was stupid. I'm not stupid... And, my dream is to A. Win the hunger games and laugh in the capitol, and bullies faces. B. Become a teacher and be more successful to show, I can do anything I put my mind to. C. Give gifts to all of Panem. I hope, one day, those will all come true, at least.