Don't let me go...{Axel}

The cold air clung to me like never before, and I shivered as it blew through my thing frame. It was amazing that I was still alive at this point, that any of us, me, my sister, and brother were still alive. I knew that it was in part due to my...questionable life style, that only just got more questionable with me signing my life away to some group run by a shady character who called himself Bear. For the first time in my life I had admitted to someone that I was a prostitute. Sure it was common knowledge among alot of people in District 6 but still, to actually write it down on a piece of paper and sign my life away to them...it was frightening to me.

It was just another secret to keep from my only family that still survived. If the elements didn't kill me than for sure all of these secrets would. Annie had already learned of my dealings as a prostitute, but Gus, he was so innocent he didn't need to know yet. Out of the three of us I felt like he was still so innocent and pure, he had no secrets from us. He was never very good at keeping them anyways, his emotions always got the better of him and he would cave in to either myself of Annie. It had been so long since we had seen Annie though, one night she had wandered off, and she never returned. I could only guess what had happened to her, she could be dead for all I know. The life of a streetrat was brutal though, death occurred daily among our kind, we just had to pick up the pieces and try and make something out of them.

That's what we had tried to do since our parents had died, but sometimes it was difficult. Me, constantly working to keep us alive, doing everything and anything to keep us alive. Annie, formerly my partner in crime, one of the best pick pockets that Panem had ever seen, and beaten beyond belief. Than there was Gus, who had it the hardest. He was missing one of his limbs and he was diagnosed with cancer. Forever he would be at the mercy of others, relying on them to take care of him until the clutches of death closed in on him.

I did my best to keep him comfortable and happy, but I never knew if it was a superficial happiness that he was in. I felt like the burden of the world rested on my shoulders, it's crushing weight was almost to much to bear, and yet every time I saw the face of Annie or Gus in my mind I knew I couldn't give up, and I kept going. Those were all the thoughts that swirled through my mind as I walked into the alley that we called "home". My eyes scanned the usual places that Gus slept in, but in the fading light of the day I couldn't find him. I didn't panic though, as cruel as the thought was I knew he couldn't make it far with his condition.

Wandering forward I found him standing at the end of one of the alley, his face looking out into the streets of the district. He was standing so still, like a statue, and in all honesty he could be mistaken for one at times. Walking towards him I wrapped my arms around him from behind and rested my head on his shoulder. I caught sight of his hand that was covered in blood and heaved a sigh of sadness. "Gus, we've talked about this before, punching walls and trying to abuse yourself will only make things worse. Your body is fragile enough as it is without you losing blood because you want to beat up a wall. Please come away from there and let me bandage that up for you?"

He was unreceptive at first, not wanting me to assist him in any fashion, trying to hide his hands away from me. It was too late though, I had already seen them, seen the damage that he had caused by smashing his fist into the wall. It wasn't like he could hide anything from me, I was his older sister I always knew what was troubling him, and if something was wrong. Of course I wasn't like Annie, I couldn't make Gus happy like she could, always bring a smile to his face when he needed it the most. I was always out away from our "home" doing my "job" with the people of District 6, and trying to make sure that we stayed alive. I didn't have the time to be able to take care of him as a mother figure and take care of him financially. Before Annie had run away that had been her job, to make sure that Gus was always happy, we would only have to leave him for a few minutes tops. Now though, it was only me, forced to do the job that two people had formerly done, and I couldn't be in more than one place at once.

I cherished this time that I had with Gus, this time right now cleaning his fists, as a mother would do for her child. I know it wasn't exactly right to think of myself as a mother to Gus, we weren't that far apart in age, but since we had lost our parents it seemed like the right thing to do...be his mother I mean. The look on his face betrayed all his feelings, he had never liked blood, or violence, or anything like that, that's why it never made much sense when he did things like this. An act of rage and despair over the fact that he wasn't as independent as he probably wanted to be, in essence forced to live off the kindness, or lack there of, of people who wandered the streets of District 6.

Unlike all those people though I would always be here for Gus, that's why I did everything that I did, it was for him. I wanted to give him the life he deserved, give him the help he needed for his leg and for his cancer. While we lived in the environment we did though I wouldn't be able to give him the help he needed. Something needed to be done, that was why I had gone into the crime ring with Bean in the first place, it provided me with an opportunity to get more money, to get out of the slums, to provide for Gus like I truly wanted to.

Once I had finished cleaning his hands I moved him over to lean and against the wall and I sat down beside him. "Gus, I'm sorry about everything, about how Annie ran away, how I'm not always here for you like I should be. I can't do everything though, I can't be in more than one place at once. Since Annie left the responsibility of providing for the two of us has fallen on me. I'm not saying this to make you feel bad, but the pressure is weighing heavily down on me. That will all change soon though, I've got myself a job that might change everything, a chance for us to finally get off the streets, and I can give you the help you need."