wishing on stars that aren't there {anymore}//open
Sept 6, 2013 18:50:41 GMT -5
Post by Dreams on Sept 6, 2013 18:50:41 GMT -5
[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: DD8E87; border: F4E0C8 double 0px; width: 400px; padding: 0 0 0 0px; border-radius: 0px 0px 0px 0px;]   {female}{fifteen}{four}{open}{bio}{come sail away, styx} I'm sailing away Set an open course for the virgin sea 'Cause I've got to be free Free to face the life that's ahead of me |
I stared at my eyelids, the flaps of skin turning from black to red with each cloud variation. I had been awake for a while now, but I still hadn't really been awake. Fuzziness still clouded my mind, not allowing me to think. I let out a small sigh, a shock to my ears. The still air was disturbed by the first real sound of the morning.
My fingers clasped around the silky material of my sheets, slowly pulling it away from my body. The cool air chilled me, and I gradually opened my eyes. I could see the shaft of light glowing down on me from my window. I sluggishly raised my back up, like a dead person coming back to life. I let out a yawn, stretching my arms upwards. It woke me up, that was for sure.
I swung both of my legs on my bed side, my toes contacting the planked floor. Then the balls of my feet and finally my heels. I strode over to my dresser, curving my fingers around the drawer. I felt the polished wood and pulled outward, giving way to piles of ruffled clothes. I slipped on a hoodie, feeling the warmth that my bathing suit just didn't provide. I tugged black leggings on, my nerves letting out a happy cry. I was no longer rigid with goosebumps anymore.
I slowly made my way down the stairs, my leather sandals making a small flap with each step. My hands brushed down the furnished wood railing, smooth and fluid. I remember when I was young, daring enough to slide down the winding rail. But that was when my mother was out and my father was home. A pang of grief stabbed me, just like it did every day. I know I would be seeing him soon, but soon never seemed close enough.
I opened the door, the knob feeling familiar under my fingers. The smudge marks and the dent, which was inexplicably impaled in the brass for as long as I could remember. I stepped out, feeling the breeze chill me. I let out a shiver and opened my mouth. I could taste the salty tang dancing across my tongue. The sound of the waves lapping calmly at the sand rang in my ears. I let out a smile, the environment making me feel more alive.
I slowly made my way down to the shore, kicking up sand in my wake. I snaked my way around the short dunes that changed every year, but I took pace surely, as if I already knew where the sand dipped and hardened. The sound of the tide got closer, making me move faster. Each crash seemed to whisper in my ear to keep going, to forget the past, stop looking into the future, and live for now. That's why I always came here. For comfort by the sea.
I walked down the wooden pier, the old planks seemed to creak softly under my weight. I finally met the end, staring over the edge. I sat down, hugging my knees to my chest. Pulling my hood over my head to cover my ears, I put on a thoughtful frown. I stared out blankly into the endless ocean, mesmerized by the repetitive movement and cadence of the waves.
My life is stupid. Broken. Like a shattered sheet of glass. It can be pieced together in time. But it will never be clear, innocent, or perfect like it used to be. It will never be the same. It gets smudges that don't disappear. Reflections that never go away. Until it cracks again, and it's all over. When it is finally gone, and the suffering of life is banished...
I shuddered, feeling the chill I first got in the morning come back to me. I was hoping to feel my father's strong hand placed on my shoulder, then the large jacket he wore across my back. But it never came. The chill stayed with me, seemingly mocking my father's absence. I looked up at the stars, which were slowly fading into the blue sky.
But it was a wish I knew wasn't going to come true. Not for another several months. All I could do was wait. No dreams will ever come true if they're wished upon stars that aren't even there anymore.
Sometimes I wish this life was just a dream...
My fingers clasped around the silky material of my sheets, slowly pulling it away from my body. The cool air chilled me, and I gradually opened my eyes. I could see the shaft of light glowing down on me from my window. I sluggishly raised my back up, like a dead person coming back to life. I let out a yawn, stretching my arms upwards. It woke me up, that was for sure.
I swung both of my legs on my bed side, my toes contacting the planked floor. Then the balls of my feet and finally my heels. I strode over to my dresser, curving my fingers around the drawer. I felt the polished wood and pulled outward, giving way to piles of ruffled clothes. I slipped on a hoodie, feeling the warmth that my bathing suit just didn't provide. I tugged black leggings on, my nerves letting out a happy cry. I was no longer rigid with goosebumps anymore.
I slowly made my way down the stairs, my leather sandals making a small flap with each step. My hands brushed down the furnished wood railing, smooth and fluid. I remember when I was young, daring enough to slide down the winding rail. But that was when my mother was out and my father was home. A pang of grief stabbed me, just like it did every day. I know I would be seeing him soon, but soon never seemed close enough.
I opened the door, the knob feeling familiar under my fingers. The smudge marks and the dent, which was inexplicably impaled in the brass for as long as I could remember. I stepped out, feeling the breeze chill me. I let out a shiver and opened my mouth. I could taste the salty tang dancing across my tongue. The sound of the waves lapping calmly at the sand rang in my ears. I let out a smile, the environment making me feel more alive.
I slowly made my way down to the shore, kicking up sand in my wake. I snaked my way around the short dunes that changed every year, but I took pace surely, as if I already knew where the sand dipped and hardened. The sound of the tide got closer, making me move faster. Each crash seemed to whisper in my ear to keep going, to forget the past, stop looking into the future, and live for now. That's why I always came here. For comfort by the sea.
I walked down the wooden pier, the old planks seemed to creak softly under my weight. I finally met the end, staring over the edge. I sat down, hugging my knees to my chest. Pulling my hood over my head to cover my ears, I put on a thoughtful frown. I stared out blankly into the endless ocean, mesmerized by the repetitive movement and cadence of the waves.
My life is stupid. Broken. Like a shattered sheet of glass. It can be pieced together in time. But it will never be clear, innocent, or perfect like it used to be. It will never be the same. It gets smudges that don't disappear. Reflections that never go away. Until it cracks again, and it's all over. When it is finally gone, and the suffering of life is banished...
I shuddered, feeling the chill I first got in the morning come back to me. I was hoping to feel my father's strong hand placed on my shoulder, then the large jacket he wore across my back. But it never came. The chill stayed with me, seemingly mocking my father's absence. I looked up at the stars, which were slowly fading into the blue sky.
Oh Dad, I wish you were here.
But it was a wish I knew wasn't going to come true. Not for another several months. All I could do was wait. No dreams will ever come true if they're wished upon stars that aren't even there anymore.
I'm sailing away
Set an open course for the virgin sea
'Cause I've got to be free
Free to face the life that's ahead of me
[/i][/size]Set an open course for the virgin sea
'Cause I've got to be free
Free to face the life that's ahead of me
{wordcount 731}{outfit black hoodie and leggings, leather sandals}{mood sorrow}
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