Sleepyhead*** [Kayyyy]

I hadn't planned on staying out so late to be perfectly honest, but it seems that the pumping bass lines and sweaty bodies have this addicting trait that pulls me in and refuses to release me until I have satisfied that part of my mind that screams for some fun. As most everyone knows, I'm always craving fun, so I'm always getting pulled in. But one could say it's just in my job description. I sell drugs from my own family garden, I have the body of a goddess (Seriously, I mean it. I'm not just bragging about nothing.), and, um, did I mention I sell drugs? Highest quality cannabis in all of District 4. Or at least that's what I like to say. Helps the business further along, y'know?

And it's true. I sold quite a few dime's for way more than they are actually worth and traded the rest amongst the regular crowd for other things that are just 10 times more fun than one little spliff. But I think I will wait on the fun little pills that my main man said would, "expand my mind beyond all boundaries." And as much fun as the sounds right now, I think I will just stick to my own little joint and a nice stroll along the beach under the stars. Because the last thing I need right now is to lose control, even if is is in order to expand my mind or whatever. Such poetic bullshit. Apparently he thought I was stupid. I know perfectly well what "mind expansion" means. It means when I stick this pill in my mouth and swallow I am going to trip so hard that I will be tasting colors and feeling smells. I think I'll pass. For tonight at least.

The ground is cold on my feet, bare now that I carry my stilettos in my hand rather than having them strapped to my feet. My purse is slung over my shoulder with all of the funds I happened to acquire tonight hidden inside and a lollipop is in my mouth (yes, a lollipop, not a spliff - shocking I know.) My eye lids have begun to droop despite the fact that my heart is still beating fast beneath my ribs. It seems the late hours plus the seemingly endless amount of boys to grind on has finally taken its toll on me now that I am walking the streets alone. I suppose I should've thought this through, going home earlier to avoid this situation, but the fact of the matter is I really don't ever think. Don't judge me, I'm only young, only a poor little orphan girl trying to have a little fun before I have to grow up and learn the ways of adulthood. I scoff at the thought, scanning the shoreline for the house I'm looking for.

I have only traveled through this neighborhood a few times in my life. Why? Because everyone here has perfectly ironed, starchy shirts, a tie for everyday of the week, a necklace laced with pearls, a gold watch for each wrist, rings for every finger, and of course some special brand of cologne or perfume to wear. And they live in beautiful waterfront property. Where as I wear the same outfit almost every night, care nothing for rings, and only own one necklace which is only some cheap seashells dangling from some fishing line. I don't even wear it all that often. I do live on shore front property though. At least if you consider a big beached ship with no electricity and no running water a house. I know I do. But I can see where someone from this place would see it as a dump where dirty, stupid, drug addicted orphans happen to make their home. Well, most people from here. But I know someone who sees it almost as a haven ... or something like that?

I've been to his house before. Well, sort of. I haven't actually been inside or within even 100 yards of it, but I watched him walk through the doors and I am sure he lives around here somewhere. I had gotten really confused the first time I followed him to this neighborhood, having figured he was just some bum who wanted the weed to waste away his hours in a haze before he died in the streets. And we get random people like that visiting sometimes and I don't usually look into it all that hard. But this boy kept showing up, day after day, night after night. And it wasn't just for drugs either. Some days he would just show up and then leave after sitting in the garden and talking for awhile. He was, shall we say, a security risk. So like the fabulous older sister and guardian that I was, I followed him home just to be sure we weren't messing with some crazy psycho killer or someone who wanted to sabotage our little business. And then he walked into one of these big, pampered houses and all I could do was smile.

It seemed we had a rich boy on our hands.

I'm still a bit uncertain if I approve of it, but he is nice enough and just adorable so telling him to buzz off or leave us alone just seems completely unnecessary. Plus, he is just so much fun to tease. I know, I know, it's a tad cruel to toy with his affections like that, but I don't think he seems to mine too much. He, like most boys, likes to chase and chase and chase and then, when the girl falls into their arms, claim that it was all of their good looks and charm that won her over. What no boy knows however, is that I cannot be caught, not by anyone. At least I don't think so. But where is the fun at when everyone knows that little fact about me? That's right: Nowhere. It falls away to reveal the real guts of our universe and we die seeing nothing but the horror and terror in everyone's eyes and the wretched dump we live on. Without fun, we are no longer blind. And without blindness, we are forced to see the world as it is. Death ridden and hell bound.

So, blind fun it is. I shiver against the chilly breeze that comes off the ocean and feel a smirk crawl onto my face over the lollipop in my mouth as I see the house not too far away now. I start to run then, barefoot and surprisingly excited for a bed to sleep in. Or that's what I am hoping for. It's dark but I can still see pretty well with the street lights shining so bright. The grass is wet and cold with dew and when I look just a little further, beyond the well cared for lawn, the sandy beach and rolling waves of the ocean call out to me. And for a moment, I almost consider abandoning the plan to crash here for the night and just sleep on the beach under the stars. But then another bout of cold air swoops past me and I shiver again, craving to disappear beneath a blanket and dream of a better place. But just when I am about to turn back to the house, my eyes catch movement on the fishing boat that the family obviously owns.

I smile as I get closer, the boards of the dock creaking beneath my feet, the breeze blowing my hair in my face, and the waves beating hard against the shore. I fold my arms, fighting hard to keep the cold away from my core and the heat inside me. When I'm finally close enough, my knees threatening already to give out beneath me and my eyes so heavy one would think I was trying to hold the weight of the world on them, I call out, removing the sucker from my mouth. "Hey! What's a girl gotta do to get a bed around here?" I say, smiling my best smile.

Flicking fire
like saltwater into my eyes
You were one inch from the edge of this bed
I dragged you back
a sleepyhead, sleepyhead