your secret's safe with me :: {dars}

When you stumble across a secret, something whispered to you quietly, does that secret become your secret too? Because secrets are things nobody is supposed to know about, but when you find them, are they really secrets anymore? maybe i shouldn't have forced bette to tell me who she liked although i was dying and dying for her to tell mean what if i had died tomorrow then i would never have known and now i know it's as if it were my own trapped inside of me and bursting to get out. Maybe I'll explode from all this pressure if I keep it trapped inside of me though the only one exploding if this secret gets out is bette and the last thing i need is for my family to be mad at me because i love them more than i can take and would hate to see them mad at me.

But although the immensely heavy secret of which boy in the District has caught my cousins eye lately weighs me down with every step I take, my mind bounces and bounces from one thing to the next, so I suppose that I'll forget all about him sooner or later. i did my research and he has blonde hair like us and blue eyes like us and is tall like us and goes to training like us although i heard he has a little brother and we don't have any brothers either of us so there's something different. Picking up an arrow from the racks at the training centre, I thread it through the bow in my hands and try my hardest to concentrate. (It hurts, almost like hearing train tracks screech to a halt and burying the painful noises into my ears, to try and stop my thoughts from escalating. There's a hundred billion things running through my mind faster than I can blink and to try and slow them down, even for a minute, becomes unbearable.) i mean if he looks like us maybe in another world he could be our brother but neither of us has a brother like i said so no he couldn't be but his name is dusty chase i think or something like that and i've seen him around once or twice when bette pointed and whispere-

The arrow hits the target with a thwang!

I hadn't even realised I'd released the arrow. Or pulled back my arm, or steadied myself, or taken a deep breath before moving my fingers. i've been told at school that i should concentrate more because i'm quite bright and can do maths quite well when i put my mind to it but it's awfully hard to do that when your mind has a thousand million ideas of its own every minute. Besides, it's not like I'm going to need maths for anything important like trying to kill 23 other kids whilst you survive on minimal food scraps as you try to find water i mean maths is great for passing tests but if you don't get water you'll pass out so i think we have a clear winner here. So I took Arty's advice and followed her down (my little sister doesn't like me to walk with her when her friends are around, she says I'm too happy for them although i don't see why being happy would be a bad thing but i suppose everyone is moody when they're fourteen so i left her alone for the while.) My Our secret still hovers in my head, buzzes around my stream of consciousness and hangs between my ears - and as I turn my head to walk away from the target practice in frustration as the chorus of sounds float around the centre, a force pulls me upwards as my eyes land on the one person who has been nagging at my consciousness for hours.

"It's you!" I delight, eyes widening with excitement as I jump in front of the boy that was quite silly i probably startled him what if he had a sword or something but oh well that doesn't matter because i found him oh my goodness bette will be pleased. Grabbing the nearest weapon with the biggest smile I've felt plastered on my face in a while, I do what I do best and make friends. "I'm Tig. You're Dusty or something, right? I've heard lots about you."