Awesome Insultes :D

Awesome Insultes :D Apr 27, 2010 0:11:49 GMT -5

Quote

Post by [Ree]craft on Apr 27, 2010 0:11:49 GMT -5

If you can find better insults than these, you must tell me

> These glorious insults are from an era before the English language got boiled down to 4-letter words.

>
>The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor:
>
> She said, "If you were my husband I'd give you poison."
>
> He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
>
> A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows
> or of some unspeakable disease."
>
> "That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or
> your mistress."
>
>
> "He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr
>
> "He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." -
> Winston Churchill
>
>
> "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great
> pleasure." Clarence Darrow
>
> "He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the
> dictionary." - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).
>
> "Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading
> it." - Moses Hadas
>
> "I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of
> it." - Mark Twain
>
>
> "He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." -
> Oscar Wilde
>
> "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a
> friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
>
> "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.... if there is
> one." - Winston Churchill, in response.
>
> "I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop
>
>
> "He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright
>
> "I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." -
> Irvin S. Cobb
>
> "He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." -
> Samuel Johnson
>
>
> "He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating
>
> "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." -
> Charles, Count Talleyrand
>
>
> "He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker
>
> "Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" -
> Mark Twain
>
> "His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West
>
>
> "Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.." -
> Oscar Wilde
>
>
> "He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather
> than illumination." - Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
>
> "He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder
>
> "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx