an equestrian lesson || oriana & poppy || [arya]

Somehow, Oriana made me feel a lot stronger than I actually am. As she tried to encourage me to stand up and deal with my conflict with Lily, I almost felt as if I could do it, which I could, despite the fact that I wouldn't. "Oriana, I really see your point I do, and don't think I don't appreciate it but." I was trying to figure out how to explain it without sounding terrible rude or angry. "You don't understand what my family is like. We do not fight, it's the only thing that is strictly forbidden." I fell silent, as I understood what a terrible wuss I must be. She was braver than me, and she would probably had stood up to Oriana a long time ago. I'm just not like that. I let people walk all over me, without even questioning it. Sometimes, I don't even realize someone is using me. 

The carrige rocked back and forth a bit due to the rocks that nobody seemed to care enough to pick up. It wasn't like road maintaince was one of the most important issues when it came to district 10. Even me, a spoiled farmers girl hadn't even noticed it before. The District was beautiful though, honestly, I would guess it was more beautiful than most of the other - even though I had no way of knowing this. Maybe not District 4, with the ocean. 

The forbidden temptation to following Orianas advice kept growing like a unwished tumor in my mind, slowly eating all the other thought that circled my head, leaving me no choice but to consider it as an option. "You know what.. Maybe I could?" My voice quivered, and I felt utterly ashamed of my own cowardice. Just thinking of it was about the most rebellious thing I have ever done, which says more about me than the thought. I've always been too everything - too nice, too obedient, too loyal, too generous. And look where that has gotten me? Every single person I have ever knewn, has used me one way or another. Everyone but Oriana, who sat there next to me, giving the most protruding advice I have ever gotten. 

I jumped off the carriage, collecting the rains in my left hand. "You know what Oriana, You are absolutely right. I need to stand up for myself. Stop being such a damn coward!" I almost shouted it. I silented myself as I realized everyone around me was staring. Blood rushed through my veins, coloring my face firey-red. For the sake of it, I kept my head down while tieing the horse up to a pole next to a tub of water where some other horses stood. It was just outside a bar, not a fancy one as you could imagine them having in the Capitol, but a dirty old pub where all the alcoholics spent their nights.

An idea suddenly popped into my mind, a shameful, foolish even idiotic idea that just seemed so incredibly tempting all the sudden. I turned towards Oriana and took her hands in mine. I wanted to explore, I wanted to be adventerous and strong as her. "Dear Oriana, even though I've only known you for a few days - barely even that, and still, you are one of my best friends" I couldn't say my best friend, it hadn't been long enough I decided. "Will you please, my dearest sweetest, get drunk with me for the first time?" In my 14 years in this world, I had never so much as tasted the mysterious, yet - to me - so exotic and alluring flavor of the poison referred to as alcohol.  


 [OCC - I'm so sorry for taking forever to reply, I had this crazy writers block and just lost all of my inspiration. Hope you still got time for me hehe ^^]