i cry for all that is real {trix/ruze} jb
Sept 22, 2014 3:43:57 GMT -5
Post by rook on Sept 22, 2014 3:43:57 GMT -5
PATRICIA VALFIERNOLiving in a cruel world, drudging with my feet in the snow
On a day out, and it's a night now
Doctor, I've been walking by the side of the road
For a long time, and I'm going out of my mind.The mask I wear now is composure. Composed because I cannot let my little sister see what I have become. I am so very human at this moment, and if Rose sees me as anything less than the superhero she knows I am, then what hope does she have? All my life I have been looking after her, caring for her in place of our Ripred-forsaken parents. I am not just a sister to her - I am her rock. She depends on me so much, even if she doesn't know it. I mean, she's gained so much independence in recent years, but without me how will she cope? How will she fend for herself. She has no one else. No one.
And me. I am going to die. I keep looking at my palms, and I know they are not hands that could strangle someone to death, or wield a weapon. I am not a killer, and to survive the Games you need to be a killer. Simple as that. I almost laugh - That's the one mask I could never wear. Even if it meant dying otherwise, I still wouldn't put it on. Taboo mask. Murder mask. I could never become that, even if temporarily. I just couldn't. So, I'm as good as dead, then.
A Peacekeeper opens the door and sneers at me. I aggressively dry my tears with my sleeve, not wanting to look weak in the slightest. He informs me that my sister has arrived, and so I take a deep breath. I put my composure back on, swallowing my anguish like a pill.
I erase all the negativity inside me. I suck it dry, until I am a vacuum. Every burning emotion put to one side for the sake of my little sister. She can't see me as weak. I'm Trix, part of the infamous double-act Trix n' Ruze. I'm everything she aspired to be - Looked up to. I was a mother to her when our parents walked out on us. So for her to see me upset and broken would give her no comfort, and that's all I want - Rose to be comfortable with what's going to happen.
She walks in, still in her Reaping garb. She looks so pretty and innocent in her white dress, even though I know she can be cruel and sinful when we are on a heist. All that confidence in front of criminals and crooks, I know that she could not reproduce it again - Not now that I am dead. Her backbone and grit stemmed from me, I am sure. She knew I would always look after her, and so she never worried. Me? I was always full of worry. The world is cruel and unforgiving. The man who took us for everything we had, he is but an example of the scum in this world. If I hadn't taken the initiative like I had on that day, we would have absolutely nothing. My stomach churns and tides as I think of all the men who could take advantage of little, vulnerable Rose Valfierno.
"Just my luck, huh?" I try to smile, but it is broken and sad, "Ah well, I always hated this District anyway!" I laugh, but my voice cracks and breaks. Composure. Put the mask back on. I put a hand on her shoulder, before pulling her to me in a soft embrace.Sitting on a rooftop, crazy days are coming again
I'll be running, but I'll be hidden in the masquerade
So far from me now, but oh I can hear the sound
Can't you hear the bells singing alone? You will hear it on the radiowords: 570, graphics: rook
theme: hear the bells by porter robinson