by the strength of swords } dia/tom
Sept 23, 2014 23:30:19 GMT -5
Post by анзие (Anz) on Sept 23, 2014 23:30:19 GMT -5
[googlefont="Megrim:400;Carrois Gothic SC:400;"]
Leon Krigel
though they might surround me like lions
AND CRUSH ME ON ALL SIDES
AND CRUSH ME ON ALL SIDES
He'd been listening with all muscles tensed 'til he trembled, head bowed silently over carefully aligned hands as the sound of rustling paper fills the dreaded silence of the crowd. Not a breath to be heard, not a mouse not a person's heartbeat as all things stopped, as everything
stays
(shh)
still.
Everything is still.
Then the fingers folded delicately over a strip of paper, and Leon is thrown back to a time a year ago when he was so distracted in the crowd that the sound of his name filtered through after one-two seconds, and he was thrown into a rush of color-blur-bright-brown-red-dark-dark-dark. He was lost. He is lost.
And this was the present.
He comes back to Nat's eyes sliding shut in total relief, to Finn's subtle shift in place, to Arissa's stoic expression; and then he sees the pale-faced look on a child's face, on two children's faces - Ethan Gallos and Zelphyr, their names unfamiliar to him but to become so-
But no.
"I volunteer as tribute!"
A savior he didn't have - a savior he needed back then, taking the long walk to the faraway stage all on his own.
All
on
his
own.
It's being lonely in a crowd, it's being surrounded by crushing lions on each side and f a l l i n g but each one is on the rise - to be on the rise like a growing mountain like being lifted to a pedestal none of them want-
They are alone.
He's alone in the train, the memory of warm arms ripped from his grasp burnt into his brain. ("Look after him. Don't get into trouble. I'll be back soon, Nat. I'll be back soon, Finn. Don't get yourself caught, Arissa.") Words easy enough to say but still oh-so difficult - it feels like the last time all over again and why is he here?
I'll get them killed. I'll-
No.
Leon's fingers curl into his temples, crescent-shaped marks forming on his skin like a physical manifestation of his memory, crescent-shaped like the waning moon and he promised his brother that-
It's just there, though.
stays
(shh)
still.
Everything is still.
Then the fingers folded delicately over a strip of paper, and Leon is thrown back to a time a year ago when he was so distracted in the crowd that the sound of his name filtered through after one-two seconds, and he was thrown into a rush of color-blur-bright-brown-red-dark-dark-dark. He was lost. He is lost.
And this was the present.
He comes back to Nat's eyes sliding shut in total relief, to Finn's subtle shift in place, to Arissa's stoic expression; and then he sees the pale-faced look on a child's face, on two children's faces - Ethan Gallos and Zelphyr, their names unfamiliar to him but to become so-
But no.
"I volunteer as tribute!"
A savior he didn't have - a savior he needed back then, taking the long walk to the faraway stage all on his own.
All
on
his
own.
It's being lonely in a crowd, it's being surrounded by crushing lions on each side and f a l l i n g but each one is on the rise - to be on the rise like a growing mountain like being lifted to a pedestal none of them want-
They are alone.
Aren't they?
He's alone in the train, the memory of warm arms ripped from his grasp burnt into his brain. ("Look after him. Don't get into trouble. I'll be back soon, Nat. I'll be back soon, Finn. Don't get yourself caught, Arissa.") Words easy enough to say but still oh-so difficult - it feels like the last time all over again and why is he here?
I'll get them killed. I'll-
No.
Leon's fingers curl into his temples, crescent-shaped marks forming on his skin like a physical manifestation of his memory, crescent-shaped like the waning moon and he promised his brother that-
It's just there, though.
It's right there.
Within such an easy reach.
Within such an easy reach.
"I'm flushing these down the toilet, Leon."
"No. You don't understand. I need-"
"I understand plenty. And this isn't what you need."
How does a child grow up so fast? In a blink of an eye, thrown into a bloodbath and stumbling out with the lines of a much older man creasing his face, irises contracted from the shock of it all, thinking, where have they gone where am I going what is going on who is dead who is alive I don't know where I am I am lost.
He takes one.
Just one.
Just one.
Nat doesn't need to know, after all.
And when the two children are before him aboard the train he is calm with words ("I'm Leon. How are you both feeling?") spilling off the edge of his lips into thin air, and Leon never wants to lose that feeling again.
And when the two children are before him aboard the train he is calm with words ("I'm Leon. How are you both feeling?") spilling off the edge of his lips into thin air, and Leon never wants to lose that feeling again.
i may fall but i will rise
