king of nothing [Attend+Evening]
Oct 14, 2014 7:26:03 GMT -5
Post by cass on Oct 14, 2014 7:26:03 GMT -5
attend cage
Everything changed again.
Everything was fucked up because of them. There was this burning rage bubbling beneath the surface of my chest. If I had to pinpoint it’s location I’d have said it was near my heart, and then, maybe I would have laughed because I shouldn’t have a heart, I shouldn’t feel, I should listen and do what I’m told. Iit’d be long and ironic and filled with the bitter taste of the very fact that I can’t laugh, at all. So it’d probably be some sort of gargle, cry thing. So really, no one would know that I’ve lived my entire laugh being trained to serve the Capitol, I’d have no one to tell, no one to talk to, because who hands an Avox a pen and paper asking them about their past?
Does anyone ask them what they’ve done wrong? How long would the list be once I pressed pen to paper? Would the letters scrawled out be enough or mean enough to level the pain I have suffered? Once upon a time those questions would have made me hesitate – no, in all honesty before I finally tore myself from my parents grasp I would never have thought nor acted in such a way. But now, with the remains of my independence, honor, pride and dignity stripped away like dirt (ironic seeing as I seem to be covered head to toe in blood and dirt) I can finally question the reasoning behind my existence. Too bad I didn’t see through it all before I lost it all.
Suppose that’s all on me, though. My own fucking fault.
My fists tighten, jaw squaring as I grind my teeth together. I’d long since let my dignity slide between my hands. The very right to own one had been stolen from me the day I had been stripped, beaten, bashed and tortured before being sold into a family that had paraded me around like a toy to be played with. No, I’d lost any notion of embarrassment ages ago. It hardly left an impression on me anymore, not even the fact that I was once more being sold like the slave I had inevitably become after my parents cruel teachings fazed me. Once more I was placed in front of a group of people, chains wrapped around my ankles and wrists, interlocking the two together, making sure I could not run. As though I would dare try. But they didn’t trust us, after all we were the face of every wrong doing citizen of Panem.
Well, some of us, especially seeing as I had done nothing wrong.
There it was again that flare of rage, spiking through my chest, burning beneath my skin. It was that same anger that had turned this ember into a fire and before long I knew I’d be unable to control it. Finally, finally I was able to understand and accept the fact that I wanted revenge. I wanted to hurt my parents, my family and everyone who had wronged me. For the scars on my back and my face, for the pain that spikes me in my mouth at unexpected times. Or the fact that I had never been me, not until the day before when I had finally broken my tether to them and discovered the person underneath it all and then it had been taken. Taken with every aspect of my personality.
My body was displayed to everyone, and I stood there completely naked as I was prized up for sale. It took little to no time to understand the workings of the Capitolites, and after my previous owners and before I knew it a gentleman was standing before me eyebrows raised as he stared hard at my body. He looked me up and down just as you would look at an item you were wishing to purchase. It was the nod, the way he smirked slightly, as though satisfied with what he saw. That was when I knew I’d been approved. I’d have my new owner.
It took little more then a few moments before a bulky looking man came up to me and roughly grabbed me and shoved me back and away from the stage and the crowd of buyers, I was taken to the back and shoved into a truck, ready for shipment. My stomach tightened, the thoughts of my new owner’s sending shiver’s down my spin. It’d be a lie if I said that I wasn’t scared. If I said that I wasn’t terrified of the pain and suffering I’d end up going through. I was taken to some place clothed and cleaned and told I was to behave in an acceptable manner, because if I didn’t there’d be consequences. It seemed that I’d be given little opportunity to even begin to grasp the new situation I was going to be thrown into. I was expected to accept it all and adapt as quickly and promptly as water changed direction when its course was altered.
Always do as you’re told, never question, and just behave. Just as mother had always taught us.
Then before I knew it I was outside with a man and we were forcing our way through a crowd filled with Capitolites. The clothes forced onto my skin were itchy and expensive and entirely different from the rags I’d been wearing for the past few months. It was a suit. Then the man was talking, telling me I had been bought to serve his daughter, that I was her guard, her Avox and that I would obey her every request. And he told me that they now owned me and that my reputation in the fighting arena had been enough to secure this new job. He pointed to the room she was supposed to be in as they struggled through the crowd, most people seemed to step aside when they saw me.
Dark forbidding eyes staring them all down. Perhaps it was the long, white, thin scar that ran from the corner of my eye to my chin.
Then the crowd swallowed the man up and I looked ahead, to the room and then without thinking I stepped in front of it to block the way.
Protect the girl inside. That’s your job. Do what she says. That's your job. Keep her safe.
Simple enough.
