too dark to see | {adele}

a d e l e

" got a secret
can you k e e p it? "

"I wouldn't if I were you."

Those were the only words it took, and Adele fell apart. She did what they told her to do, put her hands behind her back, let them cuff her and haul her away, and the whole time she was sure to exercise her right to 'remain silent' until further notice. She tried her hardest to avoid letting tears burn down the surface of her cheeks, but that was only a near perfect attempt. It was hard watching District Five and everyone she loved grow smaller in the distance as they all gawked at her with disappointment, distrust, shame.

"They told me you applied for the Autumn term next year," one said, and it was true. She had. "I doubt you'll ever get in now. Not with something like this on your record. If you want to be one of us, Santiego, you have to follow our rules." She hadn't said anything, but the only thing she wanted to do was scream. She wanted to help. She just wanted to help, to let the citizens of Five place their trust in her hands as much as they placed it in an actual Peacekeeper's. But now, as the man in white pointed out, that would be one thing she would never, ever be able to do.

Her cell was cold and dark, and there was only a tiny, double-paned window with a less-than-impressive view of the forests. A few more miles and she would be sitting in District Two, which seemed to make her even more uncomfortable than where she was. These people were scary, sure, but they were mostly just doing their job, doing what was right. She had watched District Two's tributes. Ruthless, heartless, terrifying creatures that were less than human, more so beast.

Her room also had a tiny cot with a wool blanket that itched at her exposed skin, and then a barred wall where anyone that walked by could stare at her as if she were some kind of side-show attraction, like they half expected her to do a trick for their amusement.

She rolls over so that her back faces the core of her embarrassment, and for the first time, she cries. Hard. Not like the few pesky tears that slipped against she her will, no. She sobbed. Her eyes were closed, but had they been open she was sure they would have been to watery for her to see. Her chest jerked in violent gasps for breath, and her fists clenched the blanket into balls. Ten, fifteen minutes passed, and she was so sorry, so, so sorry. And she wanted them to know that, but they wouldn't come. Even if they did, they wouldn't forgive her, and neither would she.

She should have listened to Ada when she told her it was too risky, should have swallowed her pride for once and waited for a small robbery from a shop outside the Square to investigate, not something as grown up as this, but it was too late now, and Adele could not control time. However, she could count it, and after an additional five minutes of letting herself fall apart, she stopped so she could pick up the pieces. And good thing, too, because she heard keys jingling behind her, and then heard the barred door slide open.

She was so sorry, so, so sorry.