Survival of the Hopeless // [Loony]

Never before had I known what it was like to have enough. Eternities of minimum, nanoseconds of maximum. Life ain't fair to a girl like me. I ain't ever had a whole plate to myself, ain't ever got a whole damn fruit to myself either. I never had enough, not 'till now.

My arms are full of somethin sweet, round and red.  Something different than that damn reekin dirt always layin around our home. Something for Kujo, something for me, something enough.  The opportunity came and went in a second, but I was quick, gotta be quick to live like me. His back turned to the cart for a moment, an' I've gotten away with my share. I'm hopin it ain't poisonous, but I don't think we grow anythin too dangerous here in damned District 11. We ain't the dangerous type folk, we're simple. We'll always be simple. Farmers by trade, simple by choice.

As I walk on back to the house, my head is kept low. I ain't tryna be seen 'cause the peacekeepers are vicious 'round here. The fruit is hidden under my smelly ole shirt, but I have to keep an arm 'round my belly to keep 'em from falling out. No one's out right now, it's gettin' kinda dark to be doin' much else besides sleeping. I can't see much, but I've walked this path too many times to worry bout falling. 

I broke Mama's rules tryna get these fruits. She always said not to take what can be missed. That's why we never got anythin' ripe. We got them damn spoiled goods, or them sour apples that not even the bugs can stand to eat. But we need good food. Me and Kujo ain't doing too hot, and we need somethin sweet before we turn sour on each other. 

'He looks so sick, Mama. Why's he so sick?' I ask Mama silently, tryna reach her in the heavens. She'd know the answer, she'd look at me with her kind eyes and explain to me why everything happens. She'd know.

My eyes are downcast, hurryin home before something bad happens. Everything bad happens at this hour. I need to get home.

”Need my help, darling?”

I almost damned jumped outta my skin, and, with my hopes and dreams, the fruit falls to the dirt. Shit.

I look up to the source of the nightwalker who made me drop the damn fruit. She ain't even realized what she done yet. I'm quickly on my knees, grabbin as much as I can. Only a few busted open but almost all are covered in that damn dirt. Now it's gonna taste just like the rest, dirty.

"Damnit! Why couldn't ya' just leave me alone?" 

I shovel as much as I can into my arms, and shove 'em back up my shirt. The dark red stains begin to leak through as the few of the berries that busted die in my hands.