Falling like sinking sand {Mizar's last}

Blood was pooling beneath her, dripping down her arm with each passing second as narrow eyes locked onto a severed hand. Her hand. Gritted teeth grind against each other, her jaw clenched shut before shifting her gaze from the dead extremity to the male standing with his axe raised high. Fatigue and weakness was slowly creeping through her veins as tidal waves of pain washed over top of her threatening to drown her in a sea of agony. But that wasn’t what hurt the worse. Regret set heavily inside her stomach twisting every part of her being together as a heavy heart sank deeper and deeper into the pits of an empty stomach until it could no longer drop anymore.

Each heartbeat echoed throughout her mind whispering taunting words.

(“You weren’t good enough, Mizar.
You deserve to die.
Just like Muscinda.”)

Yet her gaze couldn’t shift from the hungry man standing in front of her. His body was covered in blood. Whether it belonged to her, or someone else was beyond her wildest imagination, but by the looks of it it all was slowly changing. White knuckled fingers wrap around the flail in a last ditch effort to keep herself alive. To kill the man who had brought so much pain -

Mizar wasn’t use to betrayal.

Blood stained tears swam from the corners of her eyes silently falling down her cold, pale cheeks. Trying to take away her entire life leaving nothing but a broken, shattered dream. All the world was slowly blending together.

Wrong and right.

Black and white.

Good and evil.

Bad and evil.

Although nothing made sense. Good people never existed in the world. Just evil, bloodthirsty monsters. And that’s exactly what Henry Fleet is.

Trusting him went against her better judgement, and Ares Pine was no help because he went and fell into some vines - what a pathetic excuse of a career. But here she was. Flail raised above her head ready to kill. Ready to strike down the monster once and for all.

Many thoughts raced across her mind. Killing herself. Just ending her own life before he had a chance to. All it took was a quick swipe of a weapon and jabbing it straight through her heart. It was already shattered into millions of pieces. Shards scattered throughout her body leaving a void incapable of being field. Volunteering for the games was one of the stupidest decisions ever made throughout her short life. A life of joy was left behind by two simple words. Sam was at home. Scylla was at home. Her entire family, yet not a single one of them cared. Only Sam showed to say goodbye.

Oh Sam, I didn’t know this was goodbye forever.

Thinking of him only brought even more stress. Knowing that right now was her last final moments. Knowing that in just a few moments she could fall over right in front of every citizen in Panem only proved her weakness.

But she was alone. Trapped within the thoughts of her own mind. Nothing was real in a life where nobody cared. Every tribute gathered around was blotted out. A black spot staining their names as the killings slowly carried on. Cannon after cannon sounded as the bloodbath ended. A cannon marked with Mary Ellen’s name rang through the air. Who’s would blast next?

Taking a slow deep breath, her gaze shifted towards her own ally. A friend, a lover, a traitor. Trusting in a deathmatch only turned around and slapped the career across the face, but Mizar wasn’t a career. She was much more than that. Someone worth living. Someone who deserved to return home, yet the deciding factor was placed in front of her. A crazed man. One she broke a door down with only to find Mary Ellen and Ares together. To realize that those two cared about each other more than anything in the entire world especially in a game where survival was no longer an option.

Snarling, Mizar discarded the flail by her side as the world slowly began to fade around her. Each step felt like it took an entire lifetime. All that was left was her and a crazy foolish man standing in place of Henry.

A broken heart leaped into her throat as the girl slowly gained tunnel vision. All that mattered was destroying him. Breaking him into piece. Betrayal was an unforgivable sin, and anyone who sinned against another was sentenced to death. It was all happening faster than anticipated. A broken reality stood before her staring straight into her eyes gathering the life from her pale, fragile body.

Yet Mizar refused to die without a fight.

“You coward.” Words slurred together slipping uneasily off the tip of her tongue. Speaking was growing difficult. Sight was quickly vanishing. Leaving the girl behind. Trapping her within a world of complete chaos. Loud, deafening roars echoed throughout her ears. Spots flashed before her eyes. A storm raged on inside her. Blood leaked from vital organs filling the abdomen. Making the tiny girl into a raging woman as a baby of blood danced inside her.

Leaning forward, her hand wrapped around her own, picking it from the ground before clutching it close to her chest. A lifeline was placed before her. Fighting was a dream. It kept her going for many years. Turning every single desire into something worthwhile, yet nothing prepared, nobody taught, what it was like to fail. To fall. To lose a part of her. A silent whisper, a plea, fell lifeless across her lips. Devouring the very meaning from inside before swallowing the words whole.

(“Weak, Mizar.
You are weak.”)

Weakness wasn’t about dying. It wasn’t about losing a fight. No, weakness meant giving up. Dying without dignity. Losing oneself in the mess of a arena. Shattering the broken lives of those around. Mizar had longed to kill. To erase an innocent soul from the universe, but today that wasn’t happening.

No. Her chance was over. Thrown away by mere stupidity. A tidal wave of blood crashed throughout her body flooding her lungs. Bones rubbed against bone. Breaths caught in the back of her throat making it impossible to move, to breathe, to think.

But somehow, throughout it all, she managed to remain standing upright on her own two feet without the help of anyone. It was not needed for the greatest career of all times. Shooting a daring, hateful glance at Ares, the world ceased to exist for only a moment. Time stood still dancing around her. Eating away at her. Careers should stand together fighting for a common purpose until nobody stood in the way except the pack of careers.

(But Mizar wasn’t a career.)

“I’m a coward? At least I know how to fight unlike you. At least I know how to land a blow and not miss.”

His words shot through a broken heart like a bullet flying from a gun only pushing a dying girl closer and closer to the grave, and his maniacal laughter echoed harshly throughout her mind bouncing around her skull wall. Blood dripped from the the blade of his axe pounding against the ground in sync with her heart.

Dripping one drop at a time.

Falling.

Swimming through a puddle of blood and tears.

Yet it wasn’t enough. Her screams were quiet. Scratching against her throat clawing its way up silently slithering across her tongue until sounds burst into life. Fear surged through her veins. Everyone of her hairs stood on end. Chills crawled up and down her back. Her entire body shivered. Teeth chattered against one another until nothing was left. Blue lips and pale eyes stared back at the monster before her.

The world spun around her faster and faster leaving her standing still. Blood rushed to her ears, and in that moment all that was left was the shell of a person fighting to live. Trying to keep herself going.

But not a single person in the world mattered;

Except Sam.

Oh Sam. I’m so sorry. I was foolish to volunteer.

In seconds the world stopped moving, and the dying girl lost her footing. The ground came closer and closer, yet her arms never once flew out in front of her to catch her. Her eyes remained open watching until the ground met her violently. This is it. I am actually going to die.

After wiping the tears from her eyes, Mizar reached inside her pocket removing the tiny blue seashell given to her before leaving home. It meant so much to her. More than anything in the world. More than silver and gold. More than life itself.

(“Hi, I’m Sam.”
“Hi Sam, I’m Mizar.”
“It’s nice to meet you.”
“It’s nice to meet you too.”)

Clutching her severed hand, and the tiny seashell, a downcast gaze turned towards him. He was still standing above her with a twisted smile spreading across his face. The axe was twisting lightly in his hand. Blood danced across its blade glistening from the ever fading sun. She wanted to run. To crawl away from him, yet the strength was gone. Only cowards ran away from fear.

Mizar Roxen was not a coward.

Keeping her eyes fixed on him, she watched as the man stepped closer and closer, but not once did she move. Mizar remained a statue solely at his mercy. Her heart pounded rapidly -

Thud.

Thud.

Thud.

Thud.

- echoing through her mind as the world quickly started fading away. She wanted to open her mouth to speak, to beg for mercy. To plead with the bloodthirsty monster to save her life, but none of that was an option. Nothing would save her. No powerful healers like those in the training center. No Capitol scientist could put her back together. No. Nothing could.

His laughter filled her ears as the axe slowly raised into the air.

Sam, forgive me. I’m sorry.

Her eyes remained open glaring into the eyes of the crazed male as the axe slowly swung towards her. “I trusted you.” Words laced with malice flew past gritted teeth. No words met her’s. Silence filled the air as the axe picked up speed.

(“I promise, Muscinda."
”I volunteer!")

I’m coming home, Muscinda. I’m finally coming home.

A gentle breeze flew from the axe as it tore through her body sending the head of a lifeless career rolling across the ground.

No more sorrows.

No regrets.

No agony.

Nothing.

(Mizar Roxen was free at last.)