oh, the webs we weave

I didn't get to let the ghosts out of the attic today. They're all withering, howling within the house and I cannot reach them. They tore me from my room tonight, peacekeepers with dark helmets and harsh tones, with eyes that burn into the back of my neck. And I kept telling them I didn't do it, whatever they are saying I did- I didn't. I'm innocent. I promise just- don't hurt me please. They shout words that I do not understand, the world is big. Too big. It spins around and I am on the ground, the taste of blood and dirt in my mouth.

I choke, my stomach lurches and it hurts, it turns itself inside out and I am forced to spill the whole of my lunch onto the ground. There are tears in the corners of my eyes, the world is blurry and their hands are harsh, feet finding the soft spots on my ribs and I think I would be screaming if I could remember how. I need Celia, I need my sister. She was strong. She was resolute. She wouldn't stand for this and-

I have to be strong.

There are knees on the ground beside me, ones to which I cannot find the owner because my they force my hands through molding cuffs and then slide a wooden blade over my neck. And it hurts, it hurts, it-

oh god please help. please help me. I don't understand. I'm scared. Where are you? You're supposed to protect me. You promised! "Eirlys, what's happening?! Where are you!? Help me! Please! Anyone? Are you there?! I can't see!! I can't see! I'm scared!"

Trapped. I am trapped. I cannot breathe, I cannot turn my head. I am helpless, I am small. I am useless and that has never been so apparent. A heel strikes my jaw- sudden white hot embers burn their way into my flesh and I scream. I scream until my throat is raw and I am out of breath, until the world has gone white and I am left limp in this wooden prison.

And for the first time I am alone. There are no sisters coming to save me, there is nothing but the blood dripping from my chin and the aching in my gut. There is no Littlest Monster to chase all the others away, to hold my hand and keep me safe from the ghouls and goblins around every corner. No one is coming for me.

It was always my worst fear.

There is salt in my mouth, staining iron teeth a faded ivory. My chest heaves, sobs turning the ground to mush beneath me. A violent pattern; a constant one. Up and down and up and down. I'm scared. I'm so scared. I want to shout it, to beg for my sisters to come free me from this nightmare but I know all that will do is earn more agony. I am alone. I am so alone.

There is frost crawling through the gaps in my blue veins. All the paths home have all been snipped, leaving blood to soak my corrupted skin and crawl across every inch not already inhabited by tears or dirt. My palms are made of spider's silk, bright red dripping off of my fingertips and it is as though they too are crying. They sob, they beg; just like me. Just like my voice that tears across a silent square and I can see the thousand feet that surround me and none of them step forward. None of them.

I am so alone.

"For crimes against the capitol." The voice silences my screams, echoing through my body in place of a dying heart. (Perhaps I will have to steal a new one?) "Hyacinth and Olive Mortuus are sentenced to ten lashes- each." He wraps a meaty fist in sweat-stained locks, pulling my neck skywards and oh I think it's going to break. He's going to kill me. I'm going to die. I'm not ready to die I don't want to-

"Say hello to your sister little boy." He snarls, lips near touching my ear as I pull free. "All of this- courtesy of Little Miss Celia."

One.

I can feel my skin break, warm blood crawling out of the biting gash. "You're wrong!"

Two.

My body flinches, trying to escape a blow that inevitably forces its way through aching flesh. "Celia wouldn't want this!"

Three.

No matter how hard I try to keep my held held high, it falls.

Four.

There are splinters in my fragile skin, digging into my veins and oh- the blood is warmer than I ever imagined. Like lava down my jaws.

Five.

There's no point trying to escape. There's nothing I can do to stop this.

Six.

I'm alone.

Seven.

I want to die. I. Want. To. Die.

Eight.

"Kill me please! Stop this! Kill me, just get it over with!"

Nine.

And to the pain I finally give in.

Ten.

Silence.

Finally.