:| Dreaming Higher |: {ems}
Feb 22, 2016 22:49:39 GMT -5
Post by ᕙʕ•ᴥ•ʔᕗ on Feb 22, 2016 22:49:39 GMT -5
Tamron Rhodes
Around this time last year, I didn’t know if we were going to celebrate my birthday. A brother was in the arena, playing a game that one brother had already lost. Our energy, our time was spent in front of the screen, absorbing his every move and praying that he would come back home to us. So I plucked a flower—honestly it was probably a weed, but I liked to pretend—outside of our tiny house and presented it to—well, myself. I hadn’t expected anything which made it easier for my birthday to move along and for me to focus back on wishing that Harbinger was home.
But this year was different. While Harbinger would not be home for my birthday again—and chances were he never would—at least he was outside of the arena. It made counting the days down much easier, but it didn’t stop the hard fact that we were still without two brothers. I thought it had been a blessing, having Harbinger back home, and celebrated with everyone during the holidays. It was moments like these, however, that had me confuse reality with fiction.
I still didn’t expect much. It was harder to celebrate anything after losing Crusader and even more strenuous having to watch Harbinger live through the whole experience. Our family was pretty well spent when it came to tragedy, but I still looked out the window in the house we now lived in and wondered. “Happy birthday to me,” I whispered to the new flower I had gifted to myself, having plucked it from the far more plentiful garden in the Victor’s village. Now I had the means to keep it alive for as long as possible, even with my incapable hands. Harbinger and Crusader were the ones who could save people; I was only beginning to learn the ropes.
I believed, though. I believed that just as I would one day be able to fully celebrate my birthday again, I would be able to heal someone. I was naïve in that sense, ready to put all of my fiber into believing nearly impossible things, but I had still grown when I needed to, encountered the rude awakening of death. “I’ll heal someone one day, little flower. Just watch me.”
