sinners and saints, it's the price we pay { ☀ } for percy
Jun 21, 2016 16:36:00 GMT -5
Post by я𝑜𝓈𝑒 on Jun 21, 2016 16:36:00 GMT -5
{ as a note }
i am asking everyone who was not invited in this thread to refrain from posting. if you are thinking of jumping in and attacking someone, please reconsider. all i ask is to have this final sendoff for my tribute. this is the last chance i will ever have to write her; please do not take that away from me. thank you, your respect and consideration is deeply appreciated.
{ ☀ }
☆
{ listen }
we didn't need a story, we didn't need a real world
we just had to keep walking
and we became the stories, we became the places
we were the lights, the deserts, the faraway worlds
we didn't need a story, we didn't need a real world
we just had to keep walking
and we became the stories, we became the places
we were the lights, the deserts, the faraway worlds
("Midway on our life’s journey, I found myself
In dark woods, the right road lost.")
"Stevie!"
Her words break her chest and split her core in two. They erupt from somewhere deep within, scraping against the back of her throat like a knife. They cut through the air-
and then her blade cuts through skull of Renée Perdris.
Percy stops breathing- they both do.
And the world turns to porcelain and crashes against her shoulders.
She blinks. Her vision spins and she blinks, watches with eyes like glass as Renée breaks beneath her blade, crumples to the ground as if she is not flesh, not bone, but paper. She finds that she nearly falls, too, against the impact of what she has done. It hits her like a stone, tears through her chest and splits her spine.
She blinks. Percy catches her breath, inhales sharply at the burn in her lungs. One, two, three, she turns away from Renée, but what faces her is more than a blur of chaos and crimson. Heathcliff Travers, whose eyes are aflame with rage, stands before her. And time becomes her enemy- it slows down, turns everything to tar, and yet does not allow the space for Percy to move quickly enough.
In not even a split second, Heathcliff's blade becomes a blur in her eyes and crimson spatters through the air.
She
blinks.
And then she is nothing.
Her legs fall out from beneath her, crumbling like old, ancient stone. Upon the impact of hitting the cold, hard ground, they become dust and her body shatters, knocking every bit of air from her lungs. Her gaze is blankly fixed on the slowly broadening puddle of blood pooling from the gash in her chest, and the screams around her gradually diminish into a hum of white noise in her ears.
There is silence when she falls, not even a scream closing around her throat. There is silence, stillness, numbness-
and that is when the adrenaline begins to drain out with her blood and agony rips and tears viciously through her entire body. It begins as a sting, a white, hollow burn in her leg, but soon it is a wildfire, enveloping every fiber, splitting every nerve in one two three four more pieces. She yearns to scream until her vocal cords are frayed and poisoned, to try to sew back together her torn open chest with her hands, to cry until the paths of the tears are carved into her cheeks and her eyes are dried up wastelands.
we were you before you even existed
i carry on, carry on, carry on
and after us the flood
carry on, carry on, carry on
i carry on, carry on, carry on
and after us the flood
carry on, carry on, carry on
She is burning, and then she is drowning.
Her eyes shut, engulfing everything in a thick, inky darkness, like the dark water at the bottom of a sea. And everything stops- her breathing ceases, her heart slows, her body lies still. She is trapped by herself, by the lead in her bones and the hole in her chest that is becoming a void. If she could get up, muster her strength against the white hot agony tearing through her veins, she would run until the stone ground broke her heels. But she cannot- the strength within her has drained out into the blood pooling around her soon to be lifeless body.
Percy Delacroix knew the moment she fell that she would not get back up to her feet, but the reality slowly unravels before her, being carved starker and starker into stone, until it finally sinks. And when it does, it becomes woven into her, like a tattoo.
But she did not know her fate when they told it to her-
"You are no saint,
you are a sinner
by blood,
fool."
They decreed, with a rosary entangled in their heads and crosses drawn in gray ash and oil on their foreheads, that the black, bitter blood ran in her veins. They pointed to the stained glass window with Ilbis and his fiery, obsidian throne, and said, "You will rot there, Persephone."
And she never believed it, the stories scrawled into the Book, the promise that there is always a price to pay. She cannot believe it, even when she stared the fire they spoke of in the face, felt its heat scar her skin.
She snatched one of the silver crosses from the altar and threw it on the ground, stomped on it as if it was nothing but filth- it was, to her, it was pain and suffering and evil- and spat swear words in the priest's face. He glared in disdain and snarled, with his hand snatching a fistful of air, "You are nothing, sinner."
She is nothing, as good as a hollow corpse on the floor.
It is the price she pays.
And then there is warmth.
It blankets her, surrounds her the way Calypso's beloved sun would during the day, during the hours they spent on the ledge overlooking the meadow. She is lifted into the air, cradled protectively in saving arms- like Calypso would hold her as she fell asleep, like Atlas held her on the balcony that night.
There is warmth, but it does not chase away the darkness. It stays, leaves her barely breathing against her savior's chest but tuning into the sound of their heartbeat and imitating its rhythm with her breaths.
Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump.
(Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.)
our silver horn it leads the way
banners of gold shine
in the cold, the cold, the cold
footprints of snow
banners of gold shine
in the cold, the cold, the cold
footprints of snow
The air is thick as ink sputtering from a broken pen, burns her lungs as if she is breathing in fire, embers, and ash. She is shattered as she inhales, exhales, but she does not cease to fight against the gentle tug of Death on her shoulders, the soft whispering in her ears- "Rest now, your battle is over."
But Calypso taught her better.
It is not, she declares, and so Death releases his grip. (But she can still feel the weight of his shadow looming over her broken body.)
It is not. The words become an echo in her head as her body is laid to rest on the ground. Her leg hits the coarse rock floor gently, but nevertheless, furious white agony rips through her once more, shakes the world and turns everything into pain. She shuts her eyes tighter, lets the darkness pour in like tar all over again, and bites her lip until she can taste blood, trying desperately to swallow the scream that makes its way up her throat.
"Percy?" someone above her says. Their voice is soft, dark, familiar, and it forces her eyes open.
They chase the darkness away. It is thick- ink- and all-consuming and everlasting, but they wipe it all away with a single word and pull her to the light. Gold floods her vision, pale and faded like the candlelight of the church, but there is no warmth. Only the cold breath of oblivion on her back (she had always felt it, but now it cuts into her flesh like a blade), or perhaps that is just the loss of blood eating away at her heat.
She looks up, and tears break from the brims of her eyes. They are liquid fire on her skin, unraveling in endless strings of thick rivulets.
Stevie sits beside her, peering at her with eyes darkened by despair, his face split in anguish. His gaze flickers from Percy's face to her blood glistening in the firelight, and with each passing moment, the agony only becomes more and more defined in his features.
"Stevie," she breathes, shivering, shaking as she speaks, "Stevie." Her hand reaches out to curl around his, locking his fingers within her own. Percy's eyes meet his- they do not shift. "I . . ." but the words "I'm sorry" die on her tongue.
She is not sorry.
"I- I had to do it," she tells him, her tears leaking into her mouth as she speaks. They taste like a bitter ocean in her mouth. "She was going to kill you."
In her busts and heists with Calypso, Percy would hold the gun against the back of her captive's skull, pressed its barrel into their skin. But she would leave her finger resting just below the trigger- she never had any intentions of pulling it.
But she did, this time.
Her blade breaking through Renée Perdris's skull was nothing more than a blink. And there were no tears, no cries of regret. She killed with precision, with intent.
And she is not sorry.
blind from the road
(hail)
we carry on, carry on
follow us, we are one
(hail)
we carry on, carry on
follow us, we are one
"St . . . evie," she begins, her voice breaking and then resurfacing again. (It's so cold.) "I'm not sorry. If given the chance, I would do the same a thousand times over. Calypso always told me to pick my battles, and I did. This was my battle, Stevie. You."
From the beginning, Percy Delacroix was the savior. She was never the sinner or the saint, always somewhere in the lines between. She had thought she was indeed the sinner when she stood in the District Square with the sun beating against her back, but she became the savior when she stood before Ares to take her bullet. And it is the savior she remained when she defended Stevie and took another bullet- only this one broke her chest.
She is not a sinner. She is not a saint.
It's the price she pays.
Percy's vision blurs, and her gaze flickers to the side, where Atlas has settled. He is not quite the boy she remembers in the darkness of the Capitol city, with the sly comment and smirk on the train. He is not battlescarred, not bloodied and mangled as she, but Percy can see the cracks slowly spidering throughout his body.
She prays, to anyone or anything that will listen, that he will not break.
(If he hasn't already.)
Her breaths become uneven once more, quick and then slow and back again, breaking and breaking all over again by a new rush of tears and a new wave of ice. She can hear Death in her ear, his lips against her skin- "You are running out of time."
There are others around her, faces she knows. Friends- she has never had so many of them before.
Percy's eyes flicker up to the darkness. "Don't leave me," she pleas to them.
(I don't want to die alone.)
And then her gaze treads over the threads of blood on the ground and back to Atlas. "Atlas, it's all so cold." (And it hurts, it hurts, please make it stop.) Her eyes burn, bleed, bore, into his, fire and amber against darkness. She draws in a shallow breath, fights against the blurriness that creeps into the edges of her vision, the fading focus in her head.
She breathes in, and out-
but her lungs shatter in something between a gasp of air and the beginning sob.
Inhale exhale inhale exhale- just breathe breathe breathe. But there is no time for hesitation, no moments to steady herself.
("You are running out of time.")
"A-Atlas," she forces out the words, trembling and cracking, "Atlas . . . can you h-hold me, like you did on the . . . balcony?"
Her gaze becomes a plea.
"I don't want to be cold anymore."
(And I don't want to die alone.)
A tear swells up into a bead at the corner of her eye and carves down the side of her cheek.
the battle's fought, the deed is done
our silver hum runs deep and strong
hand to the heart, lips to the horn
hand on my breast, i'll keep you warm
(hail)
. . .
lyrics: "intro" by m83.
table: fox.
{permission from rave to powerplay stevie}
our silver hum runs deep and strong
hand to the heart, lips to the horn
hand on my breast, i'll keep you warm
(hail)
. . .
lyrics: "intro" by m83.
table: fox.
{permission from rave to powerplay stevie}