willow oak d7 resubmittion

When Iris called out into the crowd for me, I was surprised. I never realised she could raise her voise above a whisper. She always was the quietest one in the whole family, always the one to stay quiet in the corner, and despite my teasing throughout the years to the sweet little girl I always felt a strange sense of protection towards her. That was why when she walked up to the stage, I tried to force my way up, trying to limp upwards to the podium, pretending not to have heard her. The peacekeepers stopped me.

I didn't even say goodbye to her. The last thing I had said to her before she was carted off to her death was teasing her about the games, not realizing it really would be the last time I ever saw my cousin again.

"You ready to be reaped?" I had said that morning, playfully pushing her. She didn't like that joke as always and I knew it. That's why I always said it. She always was afraid of actually being reaped, going to to kill others. I never realized she could even hurt a fly. Her face had become sullen and she had shrunk away from me, letting her brown hair, which was identical to mine, cover her eyes. They were forest green just as mine are a tree bark brown.

I was always the fiery one, the one who was more likely to jump and scream and shout and throw a fit. When Iris started screaming at Justice, I had to turn away as I saw what my cousin had become. Because I was too weak to stand up for my name fast enough, my cousin became a the monster she never really was.

It was supposed to be me standing there, getting struck down by Justice Fray, not Iris.

I can still remember when we were little, I would push and tease and bully Iris, but at the end of the day she would still run up to me and hug me, her arms wrapping around my long brown hair, my green eyes reflected in hers. I would always push her away after a bit, I had promised myself a long time ago that I would never let my heart turn to goop and that I would always be strong, but Iris always seem to break my defenses no matter what, even if it was only for a moment.

She was always there for me too, even though I don't like to admit it. When my father got trampled by a tree. She was there for me and held me in her eleven year old arms as the twelve year old me wept next to a gravestone. She was there for me when my step-father permanently crippled my left leg, wiping away the blood and telling me everything was going to be alright while my eyes were wet. She was there for me just a while ago, telling me in the Justice Building that everything would be alright as the peacekeepers dragged her away from my arms, and I was still to weak to hold on to her even when I finally decided that I wanted to keep her close my heart.

The days after Justice struck her down, my tall figure has been crouched up in my room, my eyes dry because I ran out of tears a while ago. I let this happen to her, and I will never forgive myself. My nails have been bitten to small, sharp nubs. My long, slender fingers that used to wrap around her shake softly from the sobs I withhold.

I can't cry anymore. My stepdad has already yelled at me for making too much of a racket, threatening to throw me out of the house if I make anymore noise. He never cared about me or about Iris or about my mom or about anyone. My mom only even married him because he used to be a merchant that had enough money to keep the family from starving, not that he still didn't starve me.

My whole life has been a wreck, starting with when my father died, continuing on until I came to my most recent catastrophe, the loss of my cousin who never knew how much I truly loved her.