brave (Shelby/Stitch blitz)

pearl mcclain d4 [ryan]
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over the moon, where all the wild things are

brave (Shelby/Stitch blitz) Dec 30, 2017 18:55:48 GMT -5

Post by pearl mcclain d4 [ryan] on Dec 30, 2017 18:55:48 GMT -5

say what you want to say
let the words fall out
honestly
I want to see you be brave

The room was almost nauseating. I couldn’t believe that I was in such a place right here and right now. I wanted to go home, plain and simple. There was nothing that was keeping me here after all. Sure, my parents were here, but that wouldn’t have stopped me from hopping the express train to get the fuck out of here.

I don’t know why, but maybe it was the fact that people looked at me like I was fresh meat. Like I was a snack if anything. I was told I was invited here because people here in the Capitol knew of my work, however, I was starting to get a sense that my mother bribed someone to get here. She always did. She never worked for what she deserved. It was like her defining characteristic. Spineless.

They told us to talk amongst ourselves, and of course, my mother was already out and about talking to the people here like she was already best friends with her. No, long lost friends. Like she knew them from long ago. I shuddered at the thought. Meanwhile, here I am at a table where I have no clue what the fuck to do because I feel so uncomfortable.

I take a bite of one of the pastries that was served and I grimaced. It was good, but, I couldn’t bring myself to eat anymore. Well, morally I couldn’t. I took another bite out of spite. I did have to be somewhat cordial.

That’s when I was joined by someone that I actually did know here. Of course, I had never met her before, I did watch her in the games two years ago. It was none other than Shelby Levaine. Now my curiosity was piqued. I looked at her for a second before taking another bite of the pastry that tasted like sin in my mouth. ”Does it ever get easy being here?” I asked openly and brazenly. I didn’t have time to beat around the bush, seeing as there was something here other than my parents that could remind me of home.

with what you wanna say
let the words fall out
honestly
i want to see you be brave

heather - d2 [mylee]
Retired Staff

528 POSTS

last seen May 30, 2023 18:02:03 GMT -5

brave (Shelby/Stitch blitz) Jan 9, 2018 22:02:48 GMT -5

Post by heather - d2 [mylee] on Jan 9, 2018 22:02:48 GMT -5

The tiring thing here is not the conversation, but the silence.

Between introductions and every broken trail of thought, I am left in a state just short of exhaustion as I find my way back to the table I was assigned. There is seldom time for evaluation when you are caught in the constant go-round, and this is the one enjoyable aspect of the here-and now.

It is much easier to be yourself when you are not absorbed in doing so.

My stomach turns over as I take a glass from a passing tray. It converses with me often, the glass and the stomach. Both are entities that understand the word “stop” much better than I do. I toss their recommendations to the floor beneath me and stand on their necks with silver-studded heels.

When one glass turns into the second, a voice to my left catches my ear, “Does it ever get easy being here.”

With no introduction to cushion the space between us, I can only assume he has no business in the space of verbal identification. For this reason, I do not bother with the same. He knows who I am, presumably better than I do.

My identity is tied to actions I left behind in the space of two years time. There is nothing there that is carried here, to this place we are both in now, so what is there in pretending that I am carrying other names on my back.

“You act like it was difficult to begin with.”

It is not that I enjoy it here, but it is not any different from the time passed at home in District Eight. The physical appearance of the place is nothing more than a façade at best.

S H E L B Y • L E V I A N E

pearl mcclain d4 [ryan]
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2,988 POSTS

Pronouns: he/him
last seen Nov 17, 2024 8:58:06 GMT -5

over the moon, where all the wild things are

brave (Shelby/Stitch blitz) Jan 9, 2018 23:50:15 GMT -5

Post by pearl mcclain d4 [ryan] on Jan 9, 2018 23:50:15 GMT -5

say what you want to say
let the words fall out
honestly
I want to see you be brave

People here seemed to not care about what was going on around them. The starvation in most districts. The pain that is felt when loved ones are ripped from their families. The ignorance to anything other than their basic problems. It made my stomach turn. I could think about it much more because I surely would have thrown up. The sad part about it, I hadn’t really eaten anything since I got here. It became hard to do so because watching the people here, live their lives like there isn’t any real problems stole my apatite from me.

However, instead of making a scene, I had to be cordial. So I held down whatever bile was in me, and took another bite of whatever the fuck the capitol was serving me.

Then I noticed that there was someone wearing something that I designed. I took a deep breath, mostly because I had too. I couldn’t bring myself to be an ass. Even though every part of me wanted to walk up and rip off the garment. I hated the fact that the people here wore my clothes without a care in the world. They were things that I worked on for days sometimes, and yet, here they were, being worn by people that I hadn’t even met.

People that I hoped I would never meet.

But of course, here I am.

Ripred, I am ready to go home.

So I had to focus on something else, and that was Shelby. I had a feeling that she probably didn’t want to talk to a nobody. She probably had other things to see through, and being a victor, I knew better. I wouldn’t have blamed her if she just walked away from the whole situation. She didn’t need to talk to me. She didn’t even need to look at me. She already proved herself to the people here, while I probably would never get the chance to.

It was actually kind of heartbreaking in the most fucked up way possible.

However, she spoke to me, and I could feel my heart slamming against my rib cage.

Her words felt like daggers, but it wasn’t anything that I wasn’t used to. My mother regularly took jabs at me when she thought I wasn’t working fast enough. I had to be delicate here. I didn’t want to offend anyone, but my curiosity was piqued, which meant that I needed to get some kind of answer.

She told me what she thought of this place, and now I needed to return the favor.

I think?

I didn’t know.

“I guess you have a point there.” I said to her, knowing full well what she went through at the hands of the capitol. It would be rude of me to try to justify anything at this point.

I had to walk on eggshells.

I put down the pastry. ”However glossy its appearance, I can tell that with a little force, this place would crumble into what it is.” I push the plate in front of me away ”Im Stitch by the way. Sorry for being rude.” I said, realizing that I just said my thoughts without even a mention of my name. Honestly, I didn’t think it mattered. ”My first time being outside of eight. I don’t know if I like it.” I kept talking, even though I am sure she wasn’t not listening to me at this point. I saw a waiter walk by with drinks that were light blue, and I reached out for one, placing it on the table. However, I let it sit there for a moment, debating if I should drink it or not.

In the Capitol, everything came with a cost, and that was something I had to remember.

with what you wanna say
let the words fall out
honestly
i want to see you be brave