Waltz {Rye oneshot}
Sept 28, 2018 15:25:17 GMT -5
Post by Sleepy Fluttershy on Sept 28, 2018 15:25:17 GMT -5
RYE
What do you do when your life has been absorbed by another person for so long that you can't remember who you are? Is there anything at all to remember? Are you sure you ever existed? Maybe yougave such a big part of yourself away that you're now a part of another human being who doesn't even see how much it all means to you. You want to go out there, where it is raining, turn your face against the wind and breathe in the smell of a new beginning. But then you open the door and see the knife marks on the wooden surface where he measured how much you'd grown over a year. The wind whirls around in your hair, hits you in the chocolate eyes with cold water and you step outside, expecting something to happen.
For a second you drink joy and freedom that pours down on you from the sky and the next moment locks your stare on the wet sand where he used to teach you how to make a handstand. You feel small and vulnerable. This wind is enough to pick you up like a golden feather and carry you away. Someday you'll find peace and happiness, you just don't know when and not knowing is a blessing and a torture at the same time. You cry, and warm salty streams mix with the cold and fresh drops on your skin. These transparent shapes smash against your forehead, nose, cheeks with such force that it crushes their roundness into shapeless sparkling smudges.
Everything is covered in water. And whilst you wish it washed everything away and gave you a new place to start, you don't want to let go. It is almost impossible to give up someone you have always been even if it wasn't really you. What if you don't have to wipe away everything you've lived for? There has to be some good in what happened - you were washed up by this house, you had a family for ten whole years and without it you wouldn't even exist. Why run from your past and not just move on, carrying it behind your shoulders?
You are tired. You are crying. You are twirling in the rain, letting the water pour down on your body.
You can't tell whether this dance is giving you hope. Your wounds could be too deep to be healed only by time and water. But there is for sure consolation in the swift movement that keeps your mind in the rain clouds.
