An Endless Winter Filled With Rage {Raven/Eagle} JB
Feb 11, 2019 17:58:37 GMT -5
Post by kap on Feb 11, 2019 17:58:37 GMT -5
but somehow, someday
♛
i'll have to face the pain
Raven had always been the strongest one of us Elsu kids, at least with her words. She was, for lack of a better term, the family badass. I suppose that's why it didn't surprise me that she volunteered. Although, just because it didn't surprise me, doesn't mean that it didn't worry me. I wasn't sure how I'd end up approaching Raven in the Justice Building, as she didn't always take kindness well. Unfortunately, she didn't usually take criticism of her actions very well, either.
I didn't agree with the fact that she volunteered, but I couldn't tell her that. I was pretty sure I understood why she had done it, anyway. At least, I thought so. It wasn't as plain and simple as it seemed on the surface, her volunteering for a young mother. No, she wanted to be back with Dove. For some reason, without even being told this by her, I could just tell- I could feel it in my bones. This had to be why she'd done it. Even if it was in part sympathy for the young mother, I had a feeling that most of it was a desire to reunite with our fallen sister.
The thought of potentially saying goodbye to Raven forever like we had to Dove, however, terrified me. I couldn't imagine losing another one of my siblings. Falcon and I, being the older two in the family that didn't end up going into the Games (at least not yet) would be expected to take care of Kestrel, our youngest sister. I certainly didn't mind taking care of Kestrel, but I didn't want to explain to her that Raven was going where Dove had gone, and might also not return. I didn't want to think about Raven facing the same fate as Dove. Usually, I was a calm, collected individual, never letting my emotions burst out of where they were hidden and kept.
When Dove died, though, my emotions did burst out. I had turned into a rage-filled, adrenaline-powered, accusatory asshole when I'd spoken to Mackenzie, the victor of the Games that Dove was forced into and killed in. I just didn't want to think of how I'd react if I lost another sister.
Regardless, if I was going to speak to Raven, I needed to be calm. I couldn't be too emotional in a positive or negative way, because, regardless, I knew it wouldn't go over well with her. We may be siblings, but I suppose we never got along as well as I would've liked. It wasn't that I didn't get along with Raven. It was more so, I suppose, that Raven and Dove got along better than any of the rest of us did with the two of them.
The Justice Building was just as I remembered it from when we'd gone there to say our goodbyes to Dove. It was posh, tidy and clean, yet dusty and obviously very old and seldom used for anything except people's yearly goodbyes to the tributes who'd be going in to that year's Hunger Games.
This year, it was Raven's room.
When I opened the door, I stepped inside, closed it behind me and looked at Raven. I didn't say anything, at first. I just looked at her, my eyes wanting to tear up. When it came to Raven, I never knew how to interact with her very well. Maybe it was time I tried her way of doing things; tough love.
"You damn well better try to win," I said to my sister. I'd never spoken to her that way before. It felt disrespectful. Although, maybe, just maybe, it'd catch her attention.
lyrics: "Cold" by Five Finger Death Punch