Bring on the Monsters [JaSaExy v Peren v Amb]
Apr 8, 2019 8:00:28 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Apr 8, 2019 8:00:28 GMT -5
(There'll be times when your faith is shaken
They're breaking your heart? Then try to hear it pound
Got to know where the real fight lies
When it's time to rise
And stand your ground)
Saturn takes time to patch himself of his wounds. Damaris fades from existence and he’s frightened of the coming night. A part of him has died under the big top – he’s not sure if it’s his courage – and now he feels empty again. He watches the sunflowers sway along in the breeze, the rain having settled to a mist. He shivers and wipes away the blood across his chest, careful to put gauze and bandages, before tending to the scrapes and bruises on his arms and legs. He watches Ex carefully from the corner of his eye, unsure.
The last time he saw the boy, he was too drunk to do much more than stumble out a few words. It was the night Saturn had tried to take his own life – which felt long enough ago, Saturn struggled to think of all that happened in between – and now he finally had another chance. His head and his heart warred; one conspiring that he did not deserve to feel any sort of happiness, or pleasure. The latter aching for any sort of chance to feel good about himself again. He’d lost the only piece of him that made sense. Did that mean he should have turned dark, and away from the other person who’d brought an ounce of happiness?
"It's all ending soon," He says to Ex, and moves into the grass next to him. He is on his side, staring at the various scars the boy has taken. It’s all he knows – the scars on his skin, the few moments of physical touch – and he’s ashamed. They weren’t lovers, or friends. Just two boys left out under a set of stars, as though the minutes left held enough to answer why any of this mattered. "I'm sorry I never got to know who you were."
"Don't worry, Saturn." Ex shifts back, head against the earth, empty eyes toward the direction of the sky. "I didn't either."
"Well..." He traces a hand down from Ex's shoulder to his hand, and then clasps it with his own. He can feel his own heart beat faster. He can smell the sweat on the boy’s skin, the coppery musk shared between them. Saturn stirs, seventeen, hungry, for the first time in days. He doesn’t know what the morning will bring, aside from more death (his own, or Ex’s, or both). But he knows that this is what he wants. "We have now, at least." He smiles and presses his body closer, his chest to Ex’s back, hands snaking along him. He kisses the boy’s neck and holds, eyes closed.
“Tell me what makes you happy."
"What I want....." There is a pause and Saturn begs for him to say his name, wanting nothing more than to be wanted by a boy he scarcely knows. Perhaps he hasn’t grown at all in five days, but then, who is expected to change his whole life in less than a week? But Ex settles, his words coming out as Saturn feels his heart beating faster. ".....is to be alive." Exover reaches back and wraps a hand around Saturn's head, his fingers through the slick of his hair. They are folding into one another, Saturn now wide-eyed, breathless. "Show me what that means."
Saturn begins by slipping off the last of his clothes, so he is naked and bare to the earth, to Ex. His body is alight under the stars, and they are two pressed together. Stars fading, but burning the last of what they have, bright and beautiful. He lets Ex feel his skin, to know him, to know that he has wanted this for some time, through his hands, his bones. From his lips he surrenders gratitude, letting Ex know that he will know what it is to feel, to cherish every inch. No matter that they are strangers, Saturn knows him now, the small of his back, the hairs on his chest. He buries into Exover, two bodies in the tall grass, two boys that know nothing and everything of one another.
He leads the boy, certain not to leave him behind. He listens for quickening breath, for the moments when Exover will hiss at his touch, and draw in air when he’s gone down the right road. Saturn finds the will of Exover intoxicating, enough that he gets lost all on his own, until a hand atop his head guides him. He revels in the smell of sweat, in the murmurings of them both, echoing across the flatlands. Saturn stops only to stare up at Ex, before moving to bring the both down to the earth again.
There’s no glory or love, no better person awaiting him. Just the moment, the pure and unbridled pleasure they take because it is there. Except he knows that this boy wants him, to be alive, and that at least a part of him wants that, too. They snake together in furious motion, Saturn showing his strength, and Ex his tenderness; they are a binary of stars, circling one another, drifting, brighter than before.
Their voices cry out in unison, shadows cast long against the earth. He knows that there is nothing, and no one but Ex in this moment. And Saturn is alive, more alive than he’s ever felt.
He sits back against the grass, empty and dripping sweat, his face flushed. "Last time I told someone to live, she got another three days." He smiles, moves to rest his head against Ex’s chest. "So why don't we keep living?"
"I like that plan." Ex reaches away for his shirt and pulls it back. "But I do have to warn you." In between his fingers, he holds up Sheriff's badge pinned to his shirt. "There's a new sheriff in town."
"Oh?" Saturn laughs, and traces a finger along Ex’s chest. "I think he may have found himself a renegade."
They are young, and lost. But not so lost they cannot find one another, here and now. Saturn pulls Exover close again. They are one and the same in that moment, bodies alight, aching for each other’s touch. He leans forward and draws out another sigh, already finding a rhythm that leads the both of them.
When time has settled, and the stars have begun to fade to the light of day, there are footsteps. Saturn is the first to turn, eyes searching for the source of sound. He covers himself and reaches for his spear, still bloodied, and pauses, spotting a figure.
“Jayne, you’re a sight for sore eyes.”
He doesn’t know whether or not she’s come to finish them off, but with Ex at his side, he’s ready to die. The fleeting euphoria not yet faded, he smiles through the afterglow.
“What, these old things?” Ex chimes in, and Saturn lets out a laugh for the first time in days.
They spend the morning putting together all the little things Saturn collected – the bits of armor, weapons, plants for all their scrapes and burns – he shares them, because he knows he can’t carry it all, and it’s better that they have some. He still feels heavy, the sadness not gone but farther away than before. He imagines Damaris at his side, the two of them dawdling, and knowing that they are both strong enough for what will come their way. It makes him smile, even as sad as he feels. He liked knowing that he had a friend, even if she was gone.
“Thank you,” He says the Jayne, a girl that’s managed to fight her way just as far with far less. “It’s just the two of us but – I think we’re coming toward the end. Better to stick it out together, until we can’t.”
And so the sun rises, the three of them still in the remnants of the big top.
He takes watch and is the first to see figures corralling in the distance. He can hear the sound of hoofbeats, too – he assumes that Jayne and Ex can, too. There is Ronan, and the boy from three, and girl from five. The boy from nine, too – and so they are more than half of what is left, all of them together.
There is vengeance to be paid, Saturn assumes. The gash across his chest is still seeping, Ronan failing yesterday to finish him. Today he might not fail. Saturn had already decided that morning that he is ready. He has learned what it meant to be brave. He has told the truth of what happened, of his shame, and guilt. He has known friendship, and darkness at its face. And he is ready to fall, just as sure as he fights until his last breath.
“I think they’re looking for trouble,” Saturn says, lighting his spear. He takes a few steps forward. “Jayne, get Ex behind you. Got to see someone about a debt,” Saturn starts off into a jog, then a run. He doesn’t have anything to say. This was death, an end, for what he’d done. But he wasn’t ashamed – he wouldn’t find shame in who he was, not from them – instead, he was proud.
After all, what a waste of energy feeling sorry for people that didn’t matter.
“HNNNNNNG!”
[Saturn Rhodon lights his spear, and attacks Ronan Keeni-Einfallen]
(No, I'm never gonna once have it easy
I'll make mistakes, but my own, and it frees me
Summer's over, it's time to begin
And if you're looking for trouble then count me in
Bring on the monsters
Bring on the monsters
Bring on the real world)
[Bring on the Monsters, The Lightning Thief]
Eaurm1qP_Xspear
1-50spear·1-50