Broken Heartbeat
Apr 29, 2019 2:34:23 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Apr 29, 2019 2:34:23 GMT -5
Curse Jinx
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Shelby makes her final blow against my arm, and I know that it is over. The willpower drains slowly out of me as the thick ruby red blood drains from every cut and every injury. The remaining fortitude that I carried with me is shattered as I collapse into the liquid sky. It’s interesting, dying in this part of the Arena. I always believed that I would meet my end at the bottom of the ocean, another sad tale of a horrible fishing accident. Instead, I lay with the birds and clouds, with only mere moments left as my tattered breath struggles to keep whatever life I have going. The last moments feeling as if they drag on, each one extending into their own eternity. Each eternity plays out a lifetime of events that I can only wish lives on past me. I can already feel Shelby reaching down and collecting my crayons as she continues on, fighting for her purpose and her dream. I can only hope that she finds it, as I can no longer continue on my own.
The tears in my eyes are now all but dried out to due to the lack of fluids left in my body. I close my eyes, hoping the experience my ultimate utopia in this last eternity that is contained in these final teardrops. Instead of darkness, I see the family, Mom and Dad standing above us children as we sit on the beach, the fire dances on the logs in the sandpit as we laugh and taste the salty sea breeze. Phoenix sits on my left and playfully pushes me as topple over onto Spell, who gives a half-hearted protest as we three eldest starts laughing. The younger children sit opposite of us as they carry on with their own rambunctious behavior; all of us laughing and enjoying the beautiful night out as the stars shine brightly. Charm gets up and crosses over to me with a lobster in her hand, a lobster that speaks in her voice.
”"Hey Curse, it's Charm. Day five! Nice work so far. Don't be afraid to take out another tribute, though. You've trained for it. I'm confident in you. You'll bring home the prize and make the Jinx family proud. I love you, Curse! Keep going strong."
She follows with words of appreciation and affirmations, words that only exist in this eternity that I have captured. She soon vanishes after she gives me one last hug, her form wavering in the breeze as she continues on with her life. Dragon soon follows with another lobster in his hands, only for this one to carry his voice from earlier that day.
”"Curse... big brother... it's Dragon. I love you, and I need you to win, okay? I want you to win. I'm cheering for you! Please be the winner. I love you."
The pain of sadness doesn’t resonate on his face any longer, only the pride that a young boy of his age can muster. I laugh at the sight because I can tell he’s trying to be so much braver and tougher than he is, much like I was when I volunteered to enter the Arena. I can’t help but see so much of me in his eyes, even if the pride hides what his voice wants to say. We embrace, and again his is gone in the wind, his final words sitting in my ears as his body is carried with the wind. One by one my siblings and parents come up to me, each one giving me their last parting words until Phoenix is left. He places his hands on my shoulders and tells me something that will resonate with me for the rest of my life.
“Curse, you still never figured out why you were given your name were you?” he chuckles as he embraces me one last time. “It’s not because of everything that was done to you, it’s because of what you stand for, and everything that this society stands against.”
His words fill my heart with warmth and understanding as he flows into the sea breeze, leaving me alone on the beach. I finally understand why I was given my name. I was not burdened to be of weak will or weak bodied, though my medical records say otherwise. I was not jinxed to be without companionship to be solitary in my romantic endeavors. I was cursed with the ability to love.
My heart, which I always thought was my greatest weakness turned out to be my greatest strength because I was given the ability to love. Love, pure unadulterated Love, the love that I possess, cannot survive in a world that I once lived in. Panem is a country that survives on the wills of the selfish, the backs of those whose love has died out generations before, and to see a love like mine is revolutionary. I fell in love with Shelby with each blow she gave me because I could see the fight she was fighting, and I can see she needed to live on. I fell in love with Ivar as pushed me out of the way, giving himself up to the swarm so that I can continue on. I fell in love with Zanita, even if it was for a brief moment as we talked and laughed in the Training Center.
Panem would break if everyone could love the way I did, and maybe that’s why I volunteered in the first place, to inspire a country so willing to destroy itself for a simple momentary entertainment to love each other, not in spite of everything that was done to us, but because of the pain and suffering that we have been forced to.
I turn my gaze out to the ocean, sitting on the log that we use as benches with this revelation in my heart, and with my spirit swelling. Because even though this eternity may be over for me, I realize that the love I possessed lives on this those I have encountered, and in the ones I heald near and dear to me. I have nothing to regret, and I sit back looking up to the stars realizing that I’ve done the best that I can and take pride in what I have achieved. There is nothing left to do except to wait. It’s ok though because I know that when my family members join me one by one, they each will have their own exciting tales to tell me, and I can’t wait to hear it. But for now it’s time for me to rest, and as I lay down in the warm sand, the heat of the fire embraces me like a warm blanket, and I close my eyes, seeing stars in my dreams.
Shelby makes her final blow against my arm, and I know that it is over. The willpower drains slowly out of me as the thick ruby red blood drains from every cut and every injury. The remaining fortitude that I carried with me is shattered as I collapse into the liquid sky. It’s interesting, dying in this part of the Arena. I always believed that I would meet my end at the bottom of the ocean, another sad tale of a horrible fishing accident. Instead, I lay with the birds and clouds, with only mere moments left as my tattered breath struggles to keep whatever life I have going. The last moments feeling as if they drag on, each one extending into their own eternity. Each eternity plays out a lifetime of events that I can only wish lives on past me. I can already feel Shelby reaching down and collecting my crayons as she continues on, fighting for her purpose and her dream. I can only hope that she finds it, as I can no longer continue on my own.
The tears in my eyes are now all but dried out to due to the lack of fluids left in my body. I close my eyes, hoping the experience my ultimate utopia in this last eternity that is contained in these final teardrops. Instead of darkness, I see the family, Mom and Dad standing above us children as we sit on the beach, the fire dances on the logs in the sandpit as we laugh and taste the salty sea breeze. Phoenix sits on my left and playfully pushes me as topple over onto Spell, who gives a half-hearted protest as we three eldest starts laughing. The younger children sit opposite of us as they carry on with their own rambunctious behavior; all of us laughing and enjoying the beautiful night out as the stars shine brightly. Charm gets up and crosses over to me with a lobster in her hand, a lobster that speaks in her voice.
”"Hey Curse, it's Charm. Day five! Nice work so far. Don't be afraid to take out another tribute, though. You've trained for it. I'm confident in you. You'll bring home the prize and make the Jinx family proud. I love you, Curse! Keep going strong."
She follows with words of appreciation and affirmations, words that only exist in this eternity that I have captured. She soon vanishes after she gives me one last hug, her form wavering in the breeze as she continues on with her life. Dragon soon follows with another lobster in his hands, only for this one to carry his voice from earlier that day.
”"Curse... big brother... it's Dragon. I love you, and I need you to win, okay? I want you to win. I'm cheering for you! Please be the winner. I love you."
The pain of sadness doesn’t resonate on his face any longer, only the pride that a young boy of his age can muster. I laugh at the sight because I can tell he’s trying to be so much braver and tougher than he is, much like I was when I volunteered to enter the Arena. I can’t help but see so much of me in his eyes, even if the pride hides what his voice wants to say. We embrace, and again his is gone in the wind, his final words sitting in my ears as his body is carried with the wind. One by one my siblings and parents come up to me, each one giving me their last parting words until Phoenix is left. He places his hands on my shoulders and tells me something that will resonate with me for the rest of my life.
“Curse, you still never figured out why you were given your name were you?” he chuckles as he embraces me one last time. “It’s not because of everything that was done to you, it’s because of what you stand for, and everything that this society stands against.”
His words fill my heart with warmth and understanding as he flows into the sea breeze, leaving me alone on the beach. I finally understand why I was given my name. I was not burdened to be of weak will or weak bodied, though my medical records say otherwise. I was not jinxed to be without companionship to be solitary in my romantic endeavors. I was cursed with the ability to love.
My heart, which I always thought was my greatest weakness turned out to be my greatest strength because I was given the ability to love. Love, pure unadulterated Love, the love that I possess, cannot survive in a world that I once lived in. Panem is a country that survives on the wills of the selfish, the backs of those whose love has died out generations before, and to see a love like mine is revolutionary. I fell in love with Shelby with each blow she gave me because I could see the fight she was fighting, and I can see she needed to live on. I fell in love with Ivar as pushed me out of the way, giving himself up to the swarm so that I can continue on. I fell in love with Zanita, even if it was for a brief moment as we talked and laughed in the Training Center.
Panem would break if everyone could love the way I did, and maybe that’s why I volunteered in the first place, to inspire a country so willing to destroy itself for a simple momentary entertainment to love each other, not in spite of everything that was done to us, but because of the pain and suffering that we have been forced to.
I turn my gaze out to the ocean, sitting on the log that we use as benches with this revelation in my heart, and with my spirit swelling. Because even though this eternity may be over for me, I realize that the love I possessed lives on this those I have encountered, and in the ones I heald near and dear to me. I have nothing to regret, and I sit back looking up to the stars realizing that I’ve done the best that I can and take pride in what I have achieved. There is nothing left to do except to wait. It’s ok though because I know that when my family members join me one by one, they each will have their own exciting tales to tell me, and I can’t wait to hear it. But for now it’s time for me to rest, and as I lay down in the warm sand, the heat of the fire embraces me like a warm blanket, and I close my eyes, seeing stars in my dreams.
