clash of legacies [carter&cedar]

The reruns of the 80th still play over and over in his head.

The gnarled teeth of the mutts tearing him apart. Carter had watched it over and over at home, recognizing where they went wrong, where things went right, and it was haunting to do. The reruns of those memories make him feel heavy over it all, but out of everything, the Justice Building is always the last thing to come across his dreams. The sight of Jack having made him so sick. His dad having come and hugging him goodbye as if it were the last time he would ever get to.

Cedar Halt had more than Carter Laws did, but was that better than his own journey.

He wouldn't have wanted his father to see him break like he had. Cedar's voice feels heavy on Carter's heart as he patiently listens. Living up to a legacy is hard enough already with the deaths of siblings, but having to face your father everyday while training would have broken Carter down to his core. A silence fills him as the sound of his heart beats in his throat as Cedar's words shatter Carter.

"Aranica likes it when you come over to use her phone. You should keep doing that. And when you're in the neighborhood, my —" Aranica. She wouldn't be handling this well. "— my dad doesn't get a lot of company. It —" Fingers tread lightly with the want to comfort Cedar's composure. He's been there in that moment. He's been there in those shoes worrying about who will tell his family the things he would never get to tell them. "— that would be good for him, I think. If you could stop by every once in awhile. If you remember."

Arbor Halt. A legend according to his father, but out of everything he's ever heard, Carter knew deep down that all of them were just human. Human with so much emotion and the reaction on stage had shattered Carter's heart. Almost enough to want to wish his name to have been called instead, but deep down, he's a selfish asshole who just wants to live. Eyes glance to Cedar Halt as they stand there. Carter wants to reach out. He wants to comfort in the only way that had helped him, but his feet stay planted to the ground.

Wander had hugged him at the first sight of living. Living in that vault with others who had lost just as much. A shiver fills his spine as Carter lets himself spill over the edge of the metaphorical emotional cliff. Carter's composure being broken down by the words and the memories as he lets himself breath for a moment. Despite everything, he's angry. He's angry at all the sacrifices they've ever made that feel pointless now.

He didn't physically die to suffer through this. Some days, he feels like he's still in that hellish vault wasting away to nothing. Some days, he feels like there is no grasp to the world around him as if he's just floating in the space between twelve. It's a calm moment before Carter lets out his words with heavy assurance.

"I will remember to."

For as long as I get to live.

The rose on the chair feels emptier than ever. Green for life. Life that Carter hopes will let Cedar Halt come home. Arbor Halt didn't deserve more heartbreak. Almost twenty eight years later, the man was still suffering from the games that he didn't deserve to suffer through. The Laws were safe, but the cost of what they'll lose feels heavy. His dad had told him to respect the victors. They've gone through enough, he would say. Every single word hangs to his ears now as he lets his voice escape broken by the emotion in his throat.

"J-Just don't give up." Eyes stare at death once more. Remembering what it was like to have her follow you. "You'll always have a home here." Clearing his throat as Carter's weight shifts to the other foot. "J-Just do the best that you can, Cedar." A smile on his lips as he gives that reassurance that he once wished for before leaving. "We'll be right behind you the entire way."

You were always going to be special, Carter.

"You're going to be special, Cedar Halt. I feel it in the air."

A friendly smile to clear the heaviness in the air, trying to remember how heavy everything felt before he left. Cedar Halt will have too many intense days in the future. He would end up walking the same path that Carter Laws had once been on. The same path that Mitchell Laws had walked on. A moment before he decides to let a comment slip into the air.

"Just watch out for the mutts, okay?"