Killian Strauss D2 [done]

My parents only cared if one of the three of us became a victor, but that chance never came. Year after year, I waited patiently for the day my name was called. Hours upon hours were spent running through the training center, and when I wasn't inside swinging weapons around, I sat at home with books in my hand working on ways to improve. Quickness isn't easy, and formulating a plan took a lot of work until it became easier and easier. So many times people underestimated me which made succeeding so much more satisfying. One individual plan didn't work against everyone. Each person was different, and I had to study them and learn the way they moved, the way they stood and within seconds I found what worked for me, and if that didn’t work, I had to make sure a backup plan was quickly formulating in my mind.

One wrong decision can come back to haunt someone, and I would focus every single day doing what I could to make sure that never happened. Silence worked wonders. Some of my opponents wanted to talk me up, but watching them spiral when words never fell from my lips was moments I would cherish forever. I had a lot to prove. I wanted people to fear me. Being known as the king became an obsession. I wanted people to bow down before me praising me for my works. Sometimes younger children would run away the moment they laid eyes on me. I was ready to prove my worth. It all led up to my eighteenth birthday when my parents expected me to volunteer, but that day never came. That’s okay, being a victor doesn’t make someone royalty.

No amount of training would ever prepare for the twists and the turn of the hunger games. Watching year after year as careers fell and lower districts won showed me all the skills, all the moves, all the fancy footwork would never amount to anything, and if it did, the slim chance of survival hung in limbo. Yet I played the part, made it seem like all my dreams came crashing down before my very eyes. Wearing the fake frown of humiliation and defeat became exhausting, but stepping foot inside the training centers and learning to improve myself, and maybe learn ways to improve the life of others became something to pass my time. District two became my playground. No building was too tall. Street lights became like monkey bars. I found ways to prove that I’m the king of the district without needing a crown, and the best part is learning how to pass it down.

I had a dream, a desire to have a family of my own. To live my life to the fullest without any regrets. Death is the end of something good, and I wasn’t ready to die. The dream of having a house, a wonderful spouse kept me going even when others pushed me to the ground. I wanted to have a library filled with books that kept me going and offer me the chance to hide in a den where nobody would ever find me. Having my nose in a book was a fun way to spend a day. Reading and learning and placing myself inside a different world even though it’s only temporary. It’s the escape we all needed, but only I found it when the world came crashing down. Losing my parents was hard, but I pushed through their death by filling my head with the stories untold, and even today it helps keep me going.

Which brings me to where I am now. Octavia, Victor, and I have built a mansion filling it with children with only one thought in mind. Our parents may have failed at receiving a crown, but I have a burning desire for more. A crown of my own even if I'm not the one to take it. At first it was simply a dream, but now it's much more. Many times in life people compare me to my siblings, however, I am much more. I am not like Victor striking people down. I’m not a social queen like Octavia. I’m just me living in my own world doing what I can do trying to live my best possible life. Part of me wants to watch the Strauss family succeed, yet the other part is wanting them to fail and face the humiliation I wore for so long. Perhaps someone in this family may succeed, or maybe they’ll fall short and face fate far worse than anything they ever imagined.

It still weighs heavily on my mind, and even the thought of it makes my bones quiver. Humiliation, becoming a disgrace, wearing a mask hiding my face forever. I want that for these children too. Set the goal so their standards are high, make it so they can never reach it. Sure, some may try to run into the games, some may try to fight each other for the right to volunteer, but until that moment, I don’t know if they will. Their success is important, and I want them to shine bright, to wear the Strauss name with pride, but it comes with a burden they may never understand, and it’s when those cracks build through the bones, their castle will crumble, and I’ll stand outside of it prepared to watch them fall leaving their fake crown at my feet. It took me a while to pick myself back up from when I was just a boy, and I never imagined where life would take me. Just like these children. Fates are already written, and nobody can change them.

This entire moment, this house, this family, is all part of my backup plan. When the first plan fails, reaching for a second is important. I didn’t have the time to prepare, and had to think on my feet without much effort, and this is my desire. Teaching others, showing the family that sometimes things fall through, and it’s important to stand back up without thinking about it. Reach for the desires, the dreams, and don’t hold back for anyone. That is what I did, and it’s what I plan on doing. Maybe these children can learn, and take a page from my book. Maybe they can understand that because they aren’t chosen or volunteering they can come up with another plan.

Sometimes just setting an example is all someone needs. While I wear this mighty crown upon my head, I understand it comes with a price. Stepping foot back into the training center long enough to show that I still have it has improved myself. I do not kill for a living. Right now I’m on my own plan B, but it’s currently my plan A. If it comes to an abrupt end, I know what I have to do, and every day is me planning for that moment. I cannot fail because the king of the jungle always has a plan B.