p s y c h o p a t h y {calla}
May 25, 2020 20:25:32 GMT -5
Post by pup on May 25, 2020 20:25:32 GMT -5
f i o n a
The stress courses through my veins, turning me into a jittery mess. The past few nights, ever since my encounter with Victor, I've lay awake, dreading my nearing death. If I wasn't in these games, I'm going to die either way. I know it. My slip up had been one too many. In all these years of hiding my imperfections, I had let one slip through.
Why couldn't I just watch. Why couldn't Victor just let me close my eyes while Annabelle was murdered. Why couldn't they just still have it in their heads that I was still their perfect little angel. He probably already told Octavia and Killian about our last interaction, how I cast my eyes away from him in shame. My treacherous eyes, the one part of me I can't control, were going to get me into a ring with one of my siblings.
Would I let their sword slide into me like Annabelle did and die nobly, refusing to let myself fall pray to sin, or would I betray myself and my faith?
I couldn't sleep this night. Instead of the stars reminding me of miracles in this world, they were laughing down at me, at my misfortunes. Why couldn't I just leave, be one with the stars, high above the fighting and pain and trials. They reminded me I wasn't perfect, shining gems in the sky like they are.
Their laughs followed me to the gym in the dead of the night. My prayers brought me no solace, only more worry. Hopefully I'd be able to get out my nerves here and recover by the morning, leaving my siblings ambitious, prying eyes out of my head.
I hadn't bothered to follow my normal routine of putting on my layers of makeup and curling my hair ever so slightly. This is who I was, imperfect. But I didn't think I needed to worry, my siblings' gossiping voices rarely reached the training center this time of night. At least not usually.
I saw him as I slashed an arm off a dummy, panting as it hit the ground with a satisfying thunk.
He had surprised me, but I must remain perfect. He couldn't see any weakness. I can't let him.
Straightening my back, I let a cheery smile form over my face.
He especially freaked me out. Little psychopath that he is.
Remember, they all think that you're an angel of death, just like them.
"Hey there, Toby. What's up?"