This Is Not A Dream [WNN Day 4]

kap
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This Is Not A Dream [WNN Day 4] Jul 10, 2020 14:57:35 GMT -5

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Post by kap on Jul 10, 2020 14:57:35 GMT -5

Pain. That was all I felt in that moment. Well, I suppose it was that, and a sense of relief that I had survived, at least for now. Jade and I helped each other get away from the fight after the boy whose name I learned to be Cyro fell to the ground, lifeless. When we were in a place we deemed safe enough again, we met up with Dominic and Zenia, which was a relief to me. I was glad to see that they had made it out alive, too.

Despite the raging thunderstorm that plagued the arena today, I sat down on the ground, not caring how much more wet I got at this point. The rain washed away some of my blood as I tended to my wounds. I looked to Jade. She was in worse shape than me, which I didn't think was even possible.

"You hangin' in there, Jade?" I asked her. I then looked to Zenia and Dom as well. I spoke to all three of my allies at once this time. "Thank you. All of you. You all are the reason I still have my life, and that means more than I could ever say."

I then went back to cleaning and tending to my wounds. I wasn't sure what else to do at this point. I knew that Dom would be struggling right now, having killed someone. That's how I was after I killed Kestrel, anyway. I looked at him with pain in my eyes.

"I understand how you feel, Dom," I told him. "I'm here for you if you need anything, okay, my love?" I said to him. I hoped he was hanging in there okay. I knew I wanted to give up after I killed Kestrel. I felt terrible. It made me wonder how he was doing, deep down inside.

I just wanted to be there for him like I knew he was for me. He'd help me if I needed anything at all, and I wanted him to know I'd do the same for him. I loved him, after all.

Then, I looked to Zenia.

"Zenia?" I said. "I'm sorry about yesterday. You didn't deserve to have me be an ass toward you."

I don't know what prompted me to apologize, but it just felt right. I hoped she forgave me. I mean, she hadn't killed me yet, after all.

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D1f Jade Morin - Alyssaimagine
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This Is Not A Dream [WNN Day 4] Jul 10, 2020 17:11:42 GMT -5

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Post by D1f Jade Morin - Alyssaimagine on Jul 10, 2020 17:11:42 GMT -5

Jade didn't like having to rely on someone else. She was used to doing things alone, but right now as her life was hanging on the line, she knew that there were no choices. She leaned on Pisces, and he leaned on her, and somehow they managed to flee the battle field. Meredith's voice was ringing in her ears, the implication and pain of that was something she did not want to face. Jade respected the other Career, even liked her, and there weren't many people like that in her life she could say the same of. She felt guilt, and pain at killing the other girl's alliance partner. Sometimes her mind wandered to Arabella, the girl she envied, loved, and wanted to be all at once and she flinched at the thought. The annoying girl who was once always so happy, could she endure it? Would Arabella be the same person even if she did? Jade didn't want to know the answers of those questions.

A part of her was angry too. Jade felt like the world was ganging up against her, with so many people pointing fingers in her direction. The Zenia Mutt accusing her of leaving her there to die, Meredith's anger with her leaving the field of battle once a body hit the ground. How many more people were going to blame her for things they would have done if the situation were reversed? Jade wouldn't have blamed Zenia for leaving if their roles were reversed, Jade wouldn't call Meredith a coward for fleeing if she had struck down one of her allies. That wasn't the type of person that she was. Would she be angry, sad, and hurt? Naturally, but she wouldn't shift the blame and harbor resentment to those who had little choice.

No, Jade blamed the Capitol. She blamed the source of the pain, the suffering, the guilt, and the blood. She'd never voice it, of course, and she'd never likely stand in a rebellion. That was just asking for death. Instead, she would hold it all in, play the actress when it was called for, act like the perfect Victor if she made it back home. Her anger would find its way in destroyed dummies, broken machines, and broken objects, because Jade was no fool and she wanted to survive. Jade would never blame the kids in the arena. They weren't the source, and if there is one thing she has learned in all of this it's that even a Career who signed up for this didn't really know what they were signing up for. Not even they could be held accountable. Of course, she knew that none of the non Careers would understand this. She had hoped Meredith would have. She hoped Dominic did too.

Somehow, she and Pisces would make it to safety. Along the way, she would slip in the water, and almost bring the two toppling down together in the river of blood. The rain poured on them, and she was soaking wet and she was dying, and she was struggling to hold on with sheer determination, but they'd somehow made it. With blurry vision, she could glimpse Dominic and the Mutt, and relief flooded through her. Jade wasn't sure why she was relieved that even the Mutt made it, but she wasn't going to let herself think on that too much. Pisces words whirled about in her mind, and she struggled to grasp onto them, "You hangin' in there, Jade?" Her mind buzzed, and she managed to try her best at an encouraging grin.

"Jus' a scr'atch, all f'ineee," she murmured. Jade was supposed to be the tough one. Her group relied on Dominic and Jade's Career strength, and she had a way of holding herself together. She hoped. There was no way she would show them any sign of weakness, not now when her alliance needed her. She held the soaking wet Dragon Plushie against her chest with one hand and hoped she could borrow some of the dragon's strength. She had to keep breathing. We can do it. She promised herself, and she wondered if she should actually believe it. After all, she was just managing to hold on.

Jade struggled to fish the needle and thread out of her satchel. She refused to ask for help, knowing it was a signal to her alliance that she was weak. She grit her teeth, saw through blurry eyes, and she managed to lift her shirt up and begin to sew herself back together. It wasn't always pretty. Sometimes she'd sew the wrong place and she'd wince. It wasn't great, but she was no doctor and she had no love of sewing clothes together. She could only manage her best, and every once in a while she'd flash the cameras an encouraging grin. She wouldn't let the world think she was gone. Jade Morin was still here to win, and she'd let them all know it one way or another.

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This Is Not A Dream [WNN Day 4] Jul 10, 2020 19:55:33 GMT -5

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Post by fireflyz on Jul 10, 2020 19:55:33 GMT -5

He had become so accustomed to the sound of joints rolling, bones cracking - the sound of destruction - that he could no longer tell where pain began or life ended. This is what you have to do to survive, Dominic, he thought. You'd better get used to it.

Yet, Dominic was used to a lot of things - like an absent parent, for example, but the past twenty-four hours had shown that he was not okay with it in the slightest. He peeled off his cloak, which was heavy and cold from the rain, and wiped away the drops of blood that still lingered on his hands and mace. He could never come to terms with killing the boy from Eleven, he knew that. The thought that if he didn't, someone else would only reminded him that there was no someone else, only someone who had resolved to inflicting the same pain on others that he had suppressed in himself.

Thunder rumbled overhead as Dominic finally came to a resting place, wringing out his cloak and slinging it around his shoulders. Jade was struggling to stitch herself up, and he almost offered to help, but he knew she wouldn't take it. He was reminded of how he had watched Madelyn patch herself up after their fight, only for Jorah Krigel to tear open the same wound once again. How ironic it was that all of them kept getting sucked into the same cycle of suffering in search of glory. Dominic wondered if Madelyn was proud of him.

Don't stick your neck out.

He did exactly that, bending forward to press a kiss to Pisces' forehead. "I understand how you feel, Dom," he said, and Dominic ran his fingers through Pisces' sopping curls as if he'd never feel them again. "I'm here for you if you need anything, okay, my love?"

A response formed in Dominic's brain but didn't reach his lips, so he merely squeezed Pisces' shoulders. His eyes flitted back to Jade, who was cuddling the cursed dragon to her chest. Damn it.

"Is there anything dry around here?" he asked, glancing around. "One of you is bound to go into shock if you don't get some warmth."

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This Is Not A Dream [WNN Day 4] Jul 10, 2020 20:17:33 GMT -5

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Post by pup on Jul 10, 2020 20:17:33 GMT -5

I-

The blood. His blood. It's everywhere. I didn't attack him, but the splatters on Dom's weapon trickle behind him as we make our escape.

Desperately, my eyes look for her, for Meredith. She was so nice, so kind. She was different than everyone else. I wanted to find her. I don't know why. Maybe just to try and form some apology. Maybe in a different situation, her dancing would have lead us to be something that resembles friendship. Maybe I could find her, apologize on behalf of Dom.

But there's nothing I could say that would make it better.

Dom-

We-

I- took Cyro's life; I orphaned Xander. I could have done something more than just stand there. Maybe I could have prevented his death in some way, right?

No. Twenty-three of us need to die. I won't be in the twenty-three.

As my brain swirled with thoughts, we ran away from the fight. Pisces and Jade hobbling, making sure that they didn't collapse from their wounds. My mind inches closer towards the possibilities. It'd be so easy to just kill them now, to just get the pain of losing them out of the way, then I could run from Dominic and find him again once he's weaker, right? It'd just be so... easy.

They'd kill me soon enough anyways.

"Thank you. All of you. You all are the reason I still have my life, and that means more than I could ever say."

Pisces wrenches me out of my desperate, chaotic thoughts.

You're alive, and a son just lost his father.

Collapsing against the damp ground, I lean forwards and draw my legs close to my body.

I want to say it so bad. I want to scream from the pain searing in my head. I just want to run into the red sea and find some way to escape the torment. Cyro's face weighs on my soul.

Instead, I just raise my eyes to look at Pisces. I can't find any words to say in response to him that wouldn't make them draw their knives on me. Dom's last blow to Cyro's back stole my tongue along with Cyro's life, turning me into an avox.

He speaks to Dom again, expressing their eternal love while Jade stitches herself up, her face wide as if she was grinning to an invisible friend. I can't tell if it's her trying to impress the crowds or her mind was deteriorating faster than I thought.

Or maybe she's the sanest of us all.

Maybe she's the only one who's able to see the truth.

I died. I remember dying. Then I remember waking up.

That's not possible.

Maybe I am just a sack of flesh the Capitol grew in a lab and filled with false memories. Maybe they'll direct me at the flip of a switch, making sure that I cause panic among the tributes who were dying way too slowly. Maybe I am just a mutt that's been convinced it's a human.

Those thoughts are too terrifying to dwell on right now.

I turn my eyes back to the ground, if I hadn't just watched the orphaning of a kid, I might've called out Pisces for his simping. But this wasn't an occasion for joking. This was one for somber reflection of what we I did.

"Zenia?" His voice is muted beneath my thoughts.

"I'm sorry about yesterday. You didn't deserve to have me be an ass toward you."

I feel the pain and stress and terror from the past few days well up behind my eyes. Brown pools become shaky as I turn my face away from the group. His quiet, simple apology was more than I had expected in here. I should be dead.

Words refuse to escape my throat. I don't know what to say. Instead I draw my legs closer to me to cover my face as Dom tries to find something to protect Dom and Pisces.

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