what now? | teddy&flynn

The Victory Tour had been a wave of emotions bubbling up. More faces to try and smile at with the heavy feeling in his chest once more; the ache of a district with dead children staring up at Flynn and him. Theodore Ursa and Flynn Garner of District Six, standing before the districts that stare at them in different stages of grief. The most he could do during that time was try and be a comfort to Flynn, but he's getting to that age where kids don't quite make sense anymore to him. A difference in age between them, but Teddy had seen Flynn come back, knowing that his heart ached for the boy. A feeling of wanting to protect the kid from the world around them. The media storm of the capitol, the unpleasantries of the districts, and their own District's strife. Teddy Ursa always had the desire to protect those who couldn't protect themselves. Flynn Garner was stronger than he realized; watching the kid survive through everything, still having his sanity and making it all the way back to Six.

Mourners had taken the district by storm. Syren's death had left a scar upon Six that would sting for as long as Flynn was alive, but Teddy was used to this. Remembering the way Basil's death had caused pain through people, he could remember the way people would stare at him. He always went to the ceremonies for the dead kids he brought home. Sorrow and pity plastered across his face as he stares at their place of rest. As cold as the stone graves surrounding the field; he always cries, whether he wants to or not. Some see him as weak, a broken boy who lives with death, but he lets his emotions come and go. The release feeling different every time, learning to let go of his own grief and not let it drown him in an ocean of salt water. Years spent bottling up emotions in the bottles of wine he'd go through; multiples at a time until he broke in the 80th. Parson's home. His brother and sister are home. Everyone is safe.

He had to keep reminding himself. Everyone was still safe. He's protected them for a long time. Cared for his family with all of his heart and now it's grown in a way. Water glass in his hand, ice melting slowly as he stares into the emptiness of the ice. His own face staring back at him; a certain sorrowful happiness to it. His eyes glowing bright at him, the feeling of stress leaving him, and the way he knows it's time to shave his beard once more. The hair growing long enough to have kept him warm, but looking shaggy around the edges. A silence filling him as he knows Flynn waits in the lounge for him to return with the promise of a drink; a deep breath as he lets the sorrow wash over him. Breath in for four seconds, hold for seven second, and release for eight seconds. A single breath of hot air that leaves his lips before he steps forward through the door.

Morning was always a strange time for him. Waking up earlier still gave him memories of Chester holding onto him, wishing the world wouldn't erupt around them. Some mornings are filled with the chill of a memory, just like this one where he can still feel the nightmares washing over him. The eruption of a volcano and the smell of sulfur that reaches his nose some mornings. Today, he's spent most of his morning prepping for a visit to the hospital with a new children's book he picked up in the capitol. A fantasy without any of the worries of the games, something that an older woman who sat in a rocking chair had sold him in her tiny bookstore in a sea of cafes and bars. As he sits back down, with a simple few words in the air.

"Here you go."

A water glass in front of Flynn and another in front of himself as he waits for the kid to start. "I am sorry to bother you this early." A sip of water that reaches the kid's lips; a reminder that the kid was alive and he's finally done what he's been trying to do for years. All it took was eleven years and too many close calls that broke his heart every time. The glass gently rests back onto the table in front of them. Teddy's eyes following the water, until he looks up to Flynn, giving the boy the respect he deserved. Not all thirteen year olds would be able to handle what Flynn has had to. A strong feeling of wanting to protect the kid in front of him washes over him, but he stays quiet, lets the boy talk to him.

"I just…all week I have just been thinking. What now? What am I meant to be doing with my time? I was just wondering what you do when the Capitol is not calling? Sorry that’s a lot of the same question."

Gently, he reaches for his own cup, letting the ice water coat his lips, cool down his body as he thinks of the days when he first came home. The work he put in at the hospitals doing visits and funding what he can for their research. Galas that he went to in order to help the sick and lost children of Six. The desire to live a life that he never felt was his own afterwards. Keeping busy only keeps the hardships away for so long, but it's those moments that made him feel alive. The moments when a kid went up to him with tears, thanking him for funding their treatment. Silently, he sits tall, eyes looking over Flynn before giving the kid a small frown. He had been in Flynn's shoes once upon a time. Burning with the cameras and stress of everything surrounding him. The first victor in Six for a long time, alone by himself.

"Simple? You live. Easier said than done, I know." Raising his hands up in a manner to show innocence, Teddy knew the words were easier to say than do. His eyes follow Flynn's form before looking back to his water and continuing. "When I came back, I was lost for awhile. Alone in a district that had mixed feelings about me. No family. No friends. I lived in this home alone for the first year in the dead silent. It wasn't a good time for me. Lost myself to bottles of wine." Holding his hands together, he can feel the shiver of memories tickling at the edges of his skin. The pain of wanting to extend his knee and being unable to. The kink in his foot that never moves. "I bounced back from then. Figured I had enough in the world for myself, so I started working to give back to the district in any way that I could. I lived my life the way I wanted to. Being a victor is a job to some, but I am not just a victor. I was a nurse before the games. I am no longer one now, but I still come in to visit the children who need me just as much as anyone else. I choose to serve my district in the only way I knew how." A small smile as he leans forward, hands tight in his hand.

"With compassion."

Sitting back up, Teddy watches Flynn carefully, letting the softness of the room around them set in. Ring the koala staring from the corner behind Teddy, a yawn reaching his ears. "You get to decide how you live now, Flynn. Do what feels right to you. Make friends, get a job, give back to your district. It's your choice from now on. You're a survivor before anything else. You don't need to be a victor every day. You're young. Explore it more. Learn more. You can decide what you want to do when you're ready." Picking up his glass, taking a drink, he can feel the cool liquid calm him down. "And if you need help deciding or need help with figuring things out, my door is always open. No matter the time of day or night, you are always allowed here." Flynn Garner was still a kid. Youth still in his skin; a kid who killed to survive. Teddy could remember the tears after winning when the youth aged to adulthood. Smiling, he sits forward, lifts his hand and ruffles Flynn's hair teasingly as he pulls back to continue.

"You're still a kid. You don't have to move too fast. Live the way you want to. Do what you want to do. You've got the support behind you."

A pause before Teddy stares at the kid in front of him, the worries of what the capitol will try to do with the innocence of this kid in front of him. He'll have to ask Quest to meet with him.

"If you need somewhere to start, I was about to head down to the hospital to read to some kids if you wanted to join?"