cicatrized souls.— [cayden/valentine]
Jul 14, 2021 10:29:27 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Jul 14, 2021 10:29:27 GMT -5
I didn't know what to make of Valentine when I first saw him. And that's what made him dangerous. There was the real me, then there was the alternative versions of myself. Masking the parts of myself I dare not show. There was the version of myself my father saw, the one my siblings saw, and the one only I had ever seen. Most of the world saw the same version of myself as my siblings. Those that I feared saw the version of myself I portrayed to my father.
When in doubt, I always resorted to the version of my father. It was better to be safe than sorry, after all. I don't necessarily fear my father, but in places like District Two, fear and respect go hand-in-hand. And I dare not show that man the slightest bit of disrespect. Speaking when spoken to, keeping my head down, and not letting my thoughts out of my minds prison. That's how I've survived the last fifteen years of my life with him. And that's how I'll survive until I can finally leave.
And, hopefully, it's how I'll survive this tutoring session. The Valerie's all have a natural talent for being careers. We have strong builds and natural reflexes. We all seem to be born with an innate drive to become a career. Excluding myself, of course. Part of me thinks my parents took home the wrong baby from the hospital.
I was born with some stronger features, but that didn't seem to translate into my actual build. And due to us being in the Career training center, my wearing a tank top pointed that out. The fact I had some muscle was obvious, but it was also obvious how little muscle was there. Meanwhile this Valentine guy looked like he could crush my skull with minimal effort. Maybe that would be better than this "tutoring" my father had arranged and paid for.
I didn't want to be here, I really didn't. I was just glad it was after hours so we were mostly alone. No one else to relish in my humiliation. I took a deep breath, reminding myself all I had to do was survive this session. Valentine would realize I was a lost cause, that I would never truly be a career, and it would be done with. I could go back to doing things I actually enjoyed. Or literally anything other than this.
I held out my hand and introduced myself to Valentine. I made sure to make eye contact, though I tried to make my gaze soft enough that it wasn't a challenge rather than a sign of respect. I made my hand shake as firm as possible. And when I spoke, I had a quieter tone of voice, though it wasn't meek. All of this was how I would speak to and address my father. Maybe he was a kinder teacher than my dad had been, but maybe not.
"Valentine, right? I'm Cayden Valerie."
When in doubt, I always resorted to the version of my father. It was better to be safe than sorry, after all. I don't necessarily fear my father, but in places like District Two, fear and respect go hand-in-hand. And I dare not show that man the slightest bit of disrespect. Speaking when spoken to, keeping my head down, and not letting my thoughts out of my minds prison. That's how I've survived the last fifteen years of my life with him. And that's how I'll survive until I can finally leave.
And, hopefully, it's how I'll survive this tutoring session. The Valerie's all have a natural talent for being careers. We have strong builds and natural reflexes. We all seem to be born with an innate drive to become a career. Excluding myself, of course. Part of me thinks my parents took home the wrong baby from the hospital.
I was born with some stronger features, but that didn't seem to translate into my actual build. And due to us being in the Career training center, my wearing a tank top pointed that out. The fact I had some muscle was obvious, but it was also obvious how little muscle was there. Meanwhile this Valentine guy looked like he could crush my skull with minimal effort. Maybe that would be better than this "tutoring" my father had arranged and paid for.
I didn't want to be here, I really didn't. I was just glad it was after hours so we were mostly alone. No one else to relish in my humiliation. I took a deep breath, reminding myself all I had to do was survive this session. Valentine would realize I was a lost cause, that I would never truly be a career, and it would be done with. I could go back to doing things I actually enjoyed. Or literally anything other than this.
I held out my hand and introduced myself to Valentine. I made sure to make eye contact, though I tried to make my gaze soft enough that it wasn't a challenge rather than a sign of respect. I made my hand shake as firm as possible. And when I spoke, I had a quieter tone of voice, though it wasn't meek. All of this was how I would speak to and address my father. Maybe he was a kinder teacher than my dad had been, but maybe not.
"Valentine, right? I'm Cayden Valerie."
